


Anything You Say Can and Will be Held Against You

by giraffecentaurs



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types
Genre: ADHD Ishimaru Kiyotaka, ADHD Oowada Mondo, Ableist Language, Alternate Universe - Non-Despair (Dangan Ronpa), Autistic Gekkogahara Miaya, Autistic Ishimaru Kiyotaka, Autistic Kirigiri Kyouko, Autistic Nanami Chiaki, Autistic Oowada Mondo, Disability, Dyslexic Oowada Mondo, First Kiss, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, Owada Daiya Lives, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Slow Burn, THATS RIGHT BABY THERES MORE, They/Them Pronouns for Fujisaki Chihiro, Trans Fujisaki Chihiro, Wink Emoji, With a dash of she for flavor, im not giving away all my secrets just yet luvs, more tags to come, that's right BOTH OF EM BABY, these boys can fit so much neurodivergence in them
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-30
Updated: 2021-02-28
Packaged: 2021-03-17 03:26:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 33,451
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29093451
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/giraffecentaurs/pseuds/giraffecentaurs
Summary: (So Only Say My Name)Kiyotaka Ishimaru and Mondo Oowada have more in common than they previously thought.
Relationships: Ishimaru Kiyotaka/Oowada Mondo
Comments: 15
Kudos: 99





	1. Rat a Tat

Kiyotaka Ishimaru never understood why people didn't follow the rules. 

Not from a lack of trying; he often tried to compensate for his shortfallings in perspective by attempting to place himself 'in other people's shoes.' He considered himself very willing to make reasonable compromises based on this exercise. Despite this, however, on this topic he always came to the same conclusion: that it was a confusing and contrarian way to live one's life. 

Predominantly, breaking the rules seemed… needlessly difficult, to say the least. Getting dressed, for example, was far easier and faster when one had a dress code to follow, as was shopping for new clothing and getting a haircut, plus it had the added bonus of not resulting in being on the receiving end of an easily avoidable reprimand. Some have made claims about the primitiveness and pointlessness of such reprimands, and perhaps if they provided evidence he might become more inclined to consider that idea, though he doubted it. There were numerous benefits to a strict dress code that he found firmly non-negotiable— the removal of obvious class stratification between students, for one, was a major benefit of uniforms (should they be provided by the institution in question, as is ethical if students are required to wear them.) This naturally led to a decrease in bullying and harassment, which he considered a top priority. Additionally, while personal expression was certainly an important part of maintaining a healthy school ecosystem, some students had styles that could inhibit the learning process significantly for those around them (such as massive curled pigtails that often made it difficult for others to see the board.) There were plenty of decent ways to accessorize and personalize a uniform that did not actively harm another student's learning process. Certainly, there was an extent to which this could be taken too far (one could paint anything as 'distracting' were they to try hard enough); however, the 'slippery slope' argumentative strategy is a simplistic fallacy that was poor form in any debate, as it proved the speaker (fittingly enough) had no firm ground to stand on. Each instance of a dress code violation is assessed individually, on a case by case basis, hence why it acted more as a guideline for both those who follow and those who enforce the rules. This effectively nullifies the slippery slope, as students are given a chance to offer a counter argument to whatever objection has been raised to their outfit, all the way up to the top of the administration if they truly believe in their cause. Moreover, having a specific and detailed dress code also promoted productivity, it made school feel like a professional occupation, allowing for an increased ability to focus associated specifically with that outfit. It was a psychological trick that told the brain, "it's time to be alert, focused, and determined!" This sort of effect operates under the principle of a Pavlovian response, a well known scientific phenomenon, not to mention the existence of self presentation theory in general. There were a few admittedly less sturdy arguments he had been able to come up with off the top of his head for why the dress code should be enforced, but he felt one could easily counter or dismiss them were they diametrically opposed to it. 

In any case, the other points didn't particularly matter, as Celestia Ludenberg had already left his field of view, uninterested in the actual reasons as to why he thought this subject was important, despite deliberately asking him to provide them. Hope's Peak did not have a detention policy in place for violations of the recommended dress code, thus she had described his requests for her to wear something more tame as 'trivial,' 'fruitless,' and 'bothersome.' Kiyotaka thought that perhaps Celeste was upset today; typically she simply ignored him. He wondered, briefly, when she had left, before continuing on his morning patrol. He hoped she hadn't run in her haste to get away from him— ah, and that's the most important reason for the dress code of them all! How could he have forgotten safety! If they had a chemistry lab today, for example, it would not be difficult for any number of her larger than life accessories to accidently come into contact with fire or some toxic material. Her voluminous hair and poofy skirt did not easily fit through most doors or passageways between desks, and it was very easy for lace and ribbons to get caught on things. And surely all of that can't be very comfortable to wear, though that could very well be a 'him' thing— most kinds of clothes made his skin feel like it was burning, even ones that were often put in the category of 'leisure wear.' Regardless, the idea of wearing high heel shoes all day everyday sounded at worst incredibly damaging to the body and at best like a headache to deal with. Maybe this was why Celeste was upset today, because the pain finally caught up to her. Now he wished she had stayed to hear more of his insight; perhaps he could've helped.

-◇⬗◆⬖◇-

Mondo Oowada never understood how anybody could follow all these goddamn, motherfuckin' rules. 

Like, seriously, forreal. Was this shit written down somewhere?! He knew the school had a handbook or whatever and that laws were written down in some big-ass secret book they only let lawyers and tax accountants read, but those were based on somethin' more complicated, somethin' people were just supposed to _know_ he guessed 'cause as far as he could tell there were way more reasons and rules that weren't written down for nobody nowhere. 

Take speeding. Sure, the _law_ said that speedin' was bad, but not like, in detail. Why can most totally legal bikes push two hundred if you weren't ever s'posed to go over seventy? The fuck're you gonna use 'em! If they wanted to stop people from speedin', then they should be makin' bikes go slower not faster, and if you're gonna say 'well, nobody wants to buy a slower bike, dumbass' then what exactly is the point of havin' the motherfuckin' law then, 'cause speedin' must not be that bad if it can be justified by people payin' up. Clearly it ain't stoppin' nobody from floorin' the gas! If they were serious about it being a problem then they would make sellin' that shit illegal, too! Sure it's dangerous, duh, he's not sayin' it's smart to go ninety on the sidewalks of Tokyo durin' rush hour, but hell if driving ain't already dangerous, and most of the other shit people do every damn day is also fuckin' dangerous. Just 'cause somethin's risky doesn't make it wrong. And— _Fuck, dude!_ If going fast is the only way to get all the goddamn bees in his chest to calm down and let him think for a second and he wasn't bein' a dumbass about it (he can admit he used to be), then what exactly was the fuckin' problem!?

"An interestin' theory, but somethin' tells me the cops ain't gonna buy into it."

"Who put those sonsabitches in charge, anyway? No, don't look at me like that, I mean it, really! Not just 'cause they get on people's case, but, like, think about, like, history or some shit! They haven't been around forever, right? So—"

Daiya laughed at him. "I know ya meant it, kid, I looked at ya like that 'cause you're gonna be late to school if you keep goin'. Eat your damn eggs, will ya?"

Mondo grumbled but did what he was told. The whole reason they even got on this topic of conversation was 'cause he woke up late and Daiya didn't want him to take it too fast on his way to school. Ugh. It's such bullshit! Being on time was a good thing, but speedin' to make it on time was a bad thing, but it was what he'd have to do to correct the other bad thing he did, which was sleepin' in, but gettin' a good night's sleep was s'posed to be a good thing, but he stayed up late which was a bad thing, but it was to do his homework which was a good thing, but he didn't finish it which was a bad thing, 'cause he had questions about the worksheet which was a good thing, but anytime he asked questions 'bout shit people looked at him like he did a bad thing! How the fuck do people fuckin' live while caring about shit like this without losing their whole-ass mind, when every time you follow the rules you also _break the goddamn rules?!_

"Mondo. School."

"Yeah, yeah, alright. I'm fuckin' goin'."

"Drive safely."

"I will!"

"I mean it."

"I said I will!"

"Promise."

"On my honor."

Daiya looked him up and down seriously, but smiled after. He wheeled over to get the door for him. "Alright. Love ya, kiddo. Have fun."

"Love ya too, bro."

-◇⬗◆⬖◇-

Mondo Oowada was seven minutes late to class for the third Monday in a row; it was the sixth time he'd been late this year. 

This trend deeply troubled Kiyotaka, who had been cursed with the plight of always noticing a pattern, even when one was, allegedly, 'not actually present.' For one thing, it meant Oowada already surpassed the amount of warnings he'd been allotted before he needed to start making up tardies in detention— only a little over a month since school began. For another, this pattern certainly seemed like the kind that was not likely to be incidental. He tried to think, had he ever seen Mondo Oowada in the dorm hall during the weekend? No, he couldn't say that he had. In fact, it seemed as though Oowada was typically absent from the campus after classes were over, aside from a few weekly workouts in the weight room. Therefore, he must stay elsewhere, and that elsewhere must foster his truancy in some way. Statistically, delinquents typically had difficult domestic situations, thus it would…

Speculating over Oowada's life was probably something people considered to be 'rude' or 'creepy' and was definitely distracting him from his classwork. Strictly speaking, it was not relevant to the inevitable detention he needed to assign to him; however, as this was hindering his classmate's ability to lead a successful student life, he felt a moral obligation to make sure everything was okay. Any hall monitor worth his salt would inquire about the state of his home life and point him to the available means of assistance provided by the school... even though that had, historically, never once been a welcome line of questioning. 

...Especially, he guessed, from Mondo Oowada, who treated everything like a strength contest and had already punched two different people in the hallways this year. Not to mention the band of goons at his beck and call. Hm. 

He began to revise the script he had used in the past for such occasions, to see if he could edit it into something that inspired less hostility, as he really would prefer not to get into a violent altercation today— but he stopped when he realized that he had, once again, lost track of the lesson. This trend regarding his lack of focus did not bode well for him; he wondered, briefly, if he might've forgotten to take his medication this morning. 

"Mr. Oowada," Kiyotaka had thankfully managed to stop him after the conclusion of their classes. He couldn't find him during lunch, meaning that Oowada had likely been expecting him. That didn't stop him from looking as though he had been caught committing an actual crime at the utterance of his name. Ah. That tone of voice must've been too harsh. Maybe he should try being more upbeat? "This morning, you were seven minutes late to class. I'm terribly sorry, but you've run out of warnings! I am going to have to assign you a detention." ...That hadn't sounded any different, had it? This time, he'd get it for sure! "The detention schedule is posted outside of the main office, I advise checking it to see which session works best for you! You must make it up by the end of the semester unless you acquire an exemption!" There, that was the easy part done. This wasn't Oowada's first detention, but he always liked to mention the list in case the offending student had forgotten or it had changed location. Kiyotaka was about to continue with his planned speech, but, as he had anticipated, his focus was no better now than it was earlier in the day— and, frankly, he'd be lying if he said he didn't want to delay getting punched in the face as much as possible. The incident with Celeste from this morning was still ringing in Kiyotaka's mind, and it was something he simply could not ignore whenever he saw this outlandish boy... maybe it'd actually be helpful to give a less severe, light reprimand before switching into the discussion of his home life, so he'd treat it like less of a big deal? Right now he looked 'angry', but it might calm him down to a more moderate 'annoyed' as he tried to explain how 'silly' Kiyotaka's dress code 'obsession' was, like usual. And that would give Kiyotaka the chance to perfect his tone! He could admit it was a bit of a long shot, but he didn't really think his original revisions to his script were substantial enough to reduce much harm, so this was probably his best course of action. "Additionally, while Hope's Peak Academy's dress code is only a recommended guideline, I sincerely urge you to consider following it, as it is more conducive to a learning envi—"

"Jesus, I get it! Shut the fuck up already!"

He responded on autopilot. "Lang—"

"If you say language I'm gonna snap your neck like a fuckin' pencil." Ah. Hm. Well, he did suppose it was a long shot. 

"Continue making threats of violence and I will have no choice but to assign you another detention." This part, at least, he had anticipated, as lashing out was not atypical in these situations. He could salvage this. "If you have a complaint with me, I implore you to discuss it civilly instead!" A civil discussion to calm him down, then introduce the topic of home issues and assistance naturally. "There is an appeal process you can go through if you wish to contest this assignment of detention," the acknowledgement that circumstance could void his punishment, making him more likely to discuss it with him; should he do this now? His script was all out of order, but it didn't seem like Oowada would be willing to talk unless Kiyotaka took the first step. Here it goes, "Additionally, Mr. Oowada, I would like to ask if there's—"

Oowada groaned. "I am _not_ in the fuckin' mood for this." He slammed his locker shut, snatched the detention slip from Kiyotaka's hand, and ran off without another word.

Kiyotaka huffed, more upset with himself than anything. He should've known improvisation was a bad idea. Looked like he was going to have to cash-in that punch to the face tomorrow.

-◇⬗◆⬖◇-

Kiyotaka Ishimaru had been stalking him all day; he kicked himself for not gettin' outta there fast enough to avoid the little fucker. 

Mondo's mood only soured since this morning— today was determined to make him annoyed in as many ways as fuckin' possible. He was late to class, again, 'cause his internal clock was shitty as hell and he always misjudged how far away the school was. That meant he didn't have the time to ask his _damn_ teacher his _damn_ question before he had to turn in his _damn_ homework, and when he went to ask it at lunch she rolled her _damn_ eyes and told him she had to eat her _damn_ food. He went to the computer lab to ask Fujisaki, but they just laughed at him before askin' if he wanted to play Cool Math Games. At that point he was so tired from the day's bullshit, nonsensical lessons and so grossed out by the sticky awfulness of the miserable little pb&j he'd quickly snagged from the dinin' hall that he just wasn't up for thinkin' 'bout shit. Even if that shit _was_ Fireboy and Watergirl. 

The constant set of eyes on him didn't fuckin' help things. It was prolly just 'cause he was late for the forty millionth time, but given that he seemed to be doin' every little motherfuckin' thing wrong today, he wouldn't've been surprised if he'd broken five other secret rules that everybody knew but him. 

And Jesus Christ, did that kid ever fuckin' blink?! Wasn't a model student s'posed to look at the board every once in awhile?!

So yeah, he'd been expectin' Ishimaru to confront him, in all honesty, yet somehow he still felt like he was taken off guard. Prolly cause the guy always says things so seriously. Maybe there was a way he coulda handled that convo with a bit more tact and grace, though he doubted any amount of decorum he could muster would fit the standards of His Majesty the Hall Monitor. He drove around aimlessly tryin' to cool his head for a couple hours after he left the school. Thankfully he didn't have to see the guys tonight, 'cause he really wasn't feelin' the whole 'talkin' to people' thing today. 

It made him so angry. Everything always made him angry, he was really getting sick of it. He hated being angry, being angry scared the hell outta him; when he was angry, he didn't think straight, sometimes he even blacked out. He didn't like it, he didn't like that the bees were back in his chest but he couldn't do shit about it 'cept get madder 'cause he promised Daiya time 'n time again he was gonna drive safe from now on. No, he couldn't avoid it, no matter how hard he tried to focus on anything else, his mind just came back to one blazing thought, written in fire and rage and piss and shit and blood, branded right across his brain: _Fuck that asshole, Kiyotaka Ishimaru._

Guy was the embodiment of all of it, every rule he never understood, every odd look he ever got. So what if Mondo was a little outta line? Why did _that bastard_ care so much about conforming to some _random-ass rules!?_ It pissed him off, everything about him pissed him off; how he didn't need to actually pay attention in class to get what the teacher was sayin', how clean and ironed his stupid uniform was, how he felt like he could pass judgement on Mondo with his giant-ass, unblinking eyes when he himself wasn't so great, he wasn't so perfect, when he was also loud and annoying and didn't seem to realize nobody actually asked him to be a _douchewad_ all the time. He had a whole facade, a whole self image that he built himself up to as a straight-laced honor student goody goody _fuckhead_ , he acted so high and mighty, and it wasn't even justified! He didn't even have a real talent, but he felt like he could force them all down instead of focusing on his own shit. Mondo wasn't born just to die in a cage! He needed to spread his wings! To raise hell! Cause a little chaos 'cause it was the only thing he could fuckin' do right! He was tired of people tryin' to hold him down, tryin' to make him shut up and follow their stupid, made up rules. 

...Especially Kiyotaka _fuckin_ ' Ishimaru, who lectured him using the same fuckin' monologue usin' the same _fuckin'_ confrontational voice everytime he _fuckin_ ' saw him and had already given him ten _fuckin_ ' detentions for stupid shit this year. Not to mention the fact that he was a _fuckin_ ' teachers' pet, meanin' it was _fuckin_ ' pointless to try and complain about him harassin' Mondo 'cause they'd all be on his _fuckin_ ' side anyway. _Fuck!_

Eventually, he made his way back home. He didn't feel much better 'bout the day, but maybe chillin' in his room for a minute would make him less likely to pitch a fit during dinner.

Oh, damnit, Daiya was waiting in the garage. 

"Look who finally decided to show up!" He smirked up at him from the mangled mess of mechanical parts on his workbench that was once upon a time the love of his life. Seeing it uncovered always made Mondo stressed. _That coulda been Daiya. That coulda been me._

Mondo grunted a hello before trying to make a break for it.

"Wait, kid, hold up a sec!" Fuuuuucccck!

Mondo stopped in his tracks and turned back 'round to face him. "Yeah?"

"You'll never believe it, but I got the most _interestin_ ' call from your school today."

Mondo groaned. "If this is about the detention, it's 'cause I was late today, 'cause I didn't wanna break our promise; don't worry, I didn't fuckin' beat someone up or whatever."

"You have detention? Sucks, man, let me know when you're doin' that. But no, wasn't 'bout that."

"Forreal?"

"Your teach says you haven't been doin' your work and that you've been harassin' her durin' her lunch break."

That caught Mondo off guard. "What?! Why the fuck did she say that?!"

"S'what I'm askin' _you_ , little bro." 

"What the fuck! I didn't do shit to her!"

"So you haven't been doing your homework?"

"What?! No! I HAVE BEEN! WHY WOULD SHE SAY THAT?"

"Why're ya lyin', man? I'm not mad at ya—"

"I'M NOT LYIN'!"

"You're yellin' at me, which means you're lyin'."

"NO, IT MEANS I'M UPSET, 'CAUSE OF _FUCKIN' COURSE_ I'M FUCKIN' UPSET, DUDE! _WHY THE HELL WOULD SHE SAY THAT?!_ " 

"Hey, c'mon, Mondo, calm down. You know that I'm not gonna hound ya 'bout your grades as long as you're tryin', and I'm not gonna ground you or nothin', I just wanna know what's goin' on—"

Mondo slammed the garage door and stomped up to his room before he did somethin' stupid like punch the concrete wall. 

What… what the hell? What the hell! What did he fuckin' do to her to get her to lie to his brother like that? Was that what _fuckin_ ' Ishimaru was gonna ask him about before he ran off? Did she call Daiya 'cause that fuckhead told her to, cause he was 'concerned' about him? Was he seriously gettin' fuckin' _bullied_ by a _power-tripping nerd?_

_Don't cry, Mondo. Cryin's fuckin' lame and it's not what a real man would do in this kinda situation._ Fuckin' Ishimaru wanted to fight him? Fine! He could take it. He wouldn't be bothered. He wouldn't break, he wouldn't back down. He'd just have to show Kiyotaka _fuckin_ ' Ishimaru that Mondo _motherfuckin_ ' Oowada was top dog. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello hello! Thank you very much for reading, I hope you enjoyed it! I'm very excited to get this fic out there, my brains been oops all ishimondo atm. I'd love to hear your thoughts so far and I hope you have a lovely day!  
> (I'm gonna try and keep all the chapter titles Fall Out Boy themed, let's see how long that lasts :P)


	2. Disloyal Order of Water Buffaloes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tw for ableist language!

Mondo Oowada was one minute late to class every day for the rest of the week. This left Kiyotaka Ishimaru feeling rather conflicted.

On the one hand, it was a marked improvement from the typical seven minutes Oowada was tardy to class, and therefore it should be rewarded, or at the very least not disincentivized! On the other hand, it still wasn't _on time,_ and what's worse, the frequency of tardies _significantly increased_ from the average of once a week. And, being that they were all around the same amount of time, that meant there was another pattern here; one that, as much as Kiyotaka wanted to give the benefit of the doubt, seemed to have the all too familiar hallmarks of spite attached to it. Every attempt Kiyotaka had made to approach Oowada had been met with avoidance, scorn, and, on one notable occasion, a middle finger. Oowada still had yet to give him a black eye, so it wasn't the _worst_ response to his pestering he'd ever dealt with, but it did make achieving his goal of _talking_ to the boy significantly harder. Which was a shame, because he had _just_ figured out his bartering chip for improving attendance! Instead of serving a full detention, he could only serve a quarter for every minute he was late up to four, at which point he'd just serve a normal full one. That way he'd still have the incentive to come on time, but he would also want to make it sooner rather than later if he was already running late. Maybe discussing this strategy with him would show Oowada that the school was willing to compromise if he was struggling, thus making the transition into discussing any factors that may be causing his lateness much easier! Perfect! Time to script it out, _this_ time he'd try to follow it more closely. 

Oh, drat! How was he going to get Oowada to actually talk to him? He'd have to be even _more_ persistent than usual, but would that scare him off? He knew Oowada would be in the computer lab with Fujisaki during lunch, and he'd probably be less likely to lash out in front of her, but this type of conversation was something that he'd been told was better to have in private. And if Oowada _was_ to go home for the weekend, as he apparently did often, that meant two days where he wouldn't be able to confront him, _and_ two more full days of being in a potentially detrimental (or, God forbid, _dangerous)_ situation. So it _had_ to be today, before he left— hm. Maybe he could get Fujisaki to conspire with him on this plan? Putting it that way made it seem underhanded, but he knew for a fact that there was a partner project in chemistry today, thanks to the copy of the lesson plan his accommodations allowed him to have. He could go over with the pretense of asking her to be his partner, she would say no, I'm sorry, I'm already working with Oowada (which was fine because he'd prefer to do it alone), he'd say ah, that's okay! And head back to his seat, discreetly providing her with a note that said I need to privately talk to Oowada during lunch, but he keeps avoiding me. Could you wait before heading to the computer lab today while I talk to him?, and she'd look up to find him in the classroom, perhaps a bit quizzically, then nod, and he'd smile at her to indicate he'd seen her nod. Any other response, such as her shaking her head or electing not to read the note, and he'd just have to think of something else. 

"Ishimaru, may I please talk to you out in the hallway?" 

"Hm? Oh! Yes ma'am!" He got up and followed their teacher out the door, trying to ignore the sudden whoosh of whispers that overtook the room the minute they'd stepped outside. "What do you need?"

"Kiyotaka, I was wondering as to why Oowada has only been assigned one detention for his tardiness to my class? He's been late every day this week. You haven't forgotten to give them to him, have you?" 

His stomach lurched as rejection sensitive dysphoria decided to start piloting his brain. "Ah! No! I'm so sorry," he bowed, "I've been handling it, I assure you! I've actually been thinking about it quite a lot! I've decided that it would be more beneficial to encourage the improvement he's been making rather than punish him for still having some struggles, so I'm going to be assigning his detention a bit differently—"

"Improvement? He's been late more times this week than any other, that's hardly what I call improvement."

"Ah! Yes, he has been, but he's only been late by one minute each time, whereas typically he's late by seven minutes, which means he's losing more class time in total in one typical tardy than he does if he's late every day of the week with one of his more recent ones. Therefore, I've decided that to encourage this upward trend, I—"

"So you're not punishing him for it at all? That's hardly like you, Kiyotaka."

"No! That's not—"

"Is he making you do this?"

"What?!" Making him?! Oowada hardly even _spoke_ to him! How could he possibly _make_ him do anything!?

"Is he bullying you into using your discretionary privileges as Ultimate Moral Compass in order to avoid punishment?" She all but yelled at him. The nausea came back in full force as his blood ran cold. Did… did she really think that he would abuse his power like that? That he would bend the rules for someone just because they were threatening to beat it out of him? He could feel himself shivering at the thought as tears pricked in the corners of his eyes.

"N-no, of course not!" He said back, probably too loudly, but at this point he couldn't really control it. 

"Oh, Kiyotaka." He tensed as she put a hand on his shoulder and tried to get him to look her in the eyes. He really wished people would start reading the accommodations forms. "It's okay, I thought it might be the case. You've been so distracted in class lately, always looking over towards him nervously and trying to figure out how to get Fujisaki away from him. It's hard for me to imagine she'd condone this, too. But you don't have to defend him just because you're worried he might hurt you, okay? I promise I'll take care of it."

He wanted to defend himself, to defend Oowada, but the words died on his tongue as she made him look into her icey, scrutinizing eyes. "N...Ngh…" 

"I'll go get your stuff and you can go to that special quiet room to calm down, okay?" She didn't have to say it so patronizingly. "I'll leave a note on the desk to let your other teachers know where you're at."

He nodded, if nothing else to get this uncomfortable hand off of his shoulder so he could properly wipe his eyes. He'd have to find out which classroom she was in later and explain everything when he was more capable of speaking. 

-◇⬗◆⬖◇-

Kiyotaka _fuckin'_ Ishimaru needed to learn how to keep is big-ass eyes to his goddamn _self_ . Maybe nobody told him, but Mondo Oowada wasn't an _animal_ in a motherfuckin' _zoo._

Wait, no, don't just switch to staring at Chihiro, you fuckin' _creep!_ Mondo had to admit, he was a little glad to not be under the microscope for once this week, but what could that bastard possibly want with _Chi?!_ He tried to get their attention, let them know about captain cunt, but they were too busy focusing on their math assignment to give a damn; all it got him was a nasty look from their teacher. Wait, speaking of, why was she—

"Ishimaru, may I please talk to you out in the hallway?"

Huh? Was that guy really in trouble? Hell yeah! Haha, get _fucked!_ Oh, wait, it could just be like, hall monitor class rep stuff. Boo. Lame. 

The door clicked shut.

"Mondo!" Chihiro angry whisper-yelled at him. "Why were you flicking paper footballs at me in class?!"

"I don't know, maybe if you just fuckin' read 'em—" They gestured to the door, then their watch "—ugh, okay, so you know how that dickhead's been glarin' at me all week? He was doin' the same to _you_ right before Ms. What's-her-face took him out to the hall."

"What? How do you know?"

"'Cause I saw him!"

"So _you_ were staring at _him,_ too!"

"What! Was not! I was..." Shit, was he? No way in hell! "...I didn't feel like I was bein' watched anymore so I looked, _for a second,_ to see if he finally laid off only to find him lookin' at _you_ instead! Did you fuckin' run in the halls or some shit?"

"No... I don't see why I'd have to be in trouble for him to do that, though. Maybe he wanted to talk to me? He seems kinda shy."

 _"Him?! Shy?!"_ Mondo balked, "He's, like, the most loud, obnoxious, outspoken person ever!"

"Yeah, when he's doing his job! That doesn't mean he's not shy outside of that. Maybe he keeps on looking over at us because he wants to make some friends."

"Friends?! With _me?!_ Fat chance, Chi. What, you see a flyin' pig this mornin' and forget to tell me?" 

Chihiro pulled a face. "Why don't you ever expect the best from people?" 

"'Cause they never expect the best from me."

"That's not—" the door opened again, causing the room to instantly go silent as the teacher walked in.

 _Without_ Ishimaru.

...The hell? Where was he? Wait, did he _seriously_ get in trouble? 

The teacher went to her desk and wrote out some sticky notes, then she grabbed Ishimaru's stuff and—

Left one of the notes on Fujisaki's desk?

Okay, seriously? The fuck was goin' on! Was he _actually_ staring at them 'cause they were in trouble? And why was the teach leaving the room with all his shit?!

The door clicked shut.

"What's it say?"

"She says she wants to talk to me during lunch…" 

Mondo tried not to look like that stung, considerin' how much the very same teacher chewed _him_ out for tryin' to talk to her durin' lunch— and that that meant he would be subjected to eating alone in the computer lab for a little while like a fuckin' _nerd._ "Kay, but why?"

"Doesn't say…"

"D'ya think he mighta said somethin' 'bout you to her?"

"No clue. I hope he's alright…"

Mondo grunted. "I guess." 

Lunch that day was horrible, Chihiro was gone the _whole_ _damn time._ What could Ms. Teacher Lady possibly have talked to them about that took the entire lunch period?! And without _fuckin'_ Ishimaru constantly poking his head in to 'check' on them (i.e. see if Fujisaki went to take a piss so he could corner Mondo) it was just… weirdly empty in there. 

Oh no, he was _not_ missing that guy bein' around. Hell to the _fuck_ no he wasn't.

...But, that didn't mean it didn't feel weird. 'Specially when lunch was over and his seat was _still empty._ Fuckin' _Ishimaru's seat_ was _empty_ for like. A _whole day. That_ was fuckin' _weird._

Now he felt kinda bad for hopin' he got in trouble. _Whatever_ it was, there's no way _that_ guy would do somethin' that got him suspended, so he must've been sick… then again, that didn't really sit right with Mondo, either. He looked fine, if a bit out of it all week, and he's pretty sure Ishimaru woulda come to school even if he was on death's doorstep with a fever hotter than the sun. It _was_ the teach who sent him out, so it could be that's what he _tried…_ maybe he should go knock on his door to see if he's doin' okay? Mondo was pretty sure Ishimaru's dorm was close to the one the school gave him, he could prolly act like he was gettin' somethin' and since he was already on his way over there he might as well— what was he thinkin'! Dude would totally give him all those fuckin' detentions he'd been wrackin' up, no matter _how_ sick he was or _how_ nice Mondo was bein' to him. And since when was Mondo Oowada such a fuckin' _softie,_ especially towards assholes who kept on shootin' daggers at him with their eyes and wouldn't ever leave him alone! He should be thankful for the fuckin' peace and quiet he got today.

But… maybe Chi was right? Maybe he's just a shy dude who wants friends? And, in that case, prolly nobody's gonna go check on him today, right? 'Cause he hasn't really, _actually_ talked to anybody yet? But why would Ishimaru wanna be friends with _Mondo,_ of _all_ people? They were totally unalike! Maybe he'd been tryin' to make friends with Chihiro 'cause they're pretty shy too, and he hadn't tried yet 'cause Mondo was always around, and that's why he kept on givin' him the stink eye. Well, then gettin' those extra detentions would prolly be worth it, if it meant he'd stop scarin' Ishimaru off and Chihiro got a friend that _wasn't_ a big stupid thug. That might make them a little more confident!

Speakin' of. "Hey, Chi! Ya got any plans for the weekend? The guys and me're gonna be pretty busy, but I'm sure I could squeeze some game time i—n..." Why were they lookin' at him like that? "Uh… Chi? There a problem?"

"What do _you_ think?"

"Uh…" What did _he_ think? Well… "I… don't... know?" That... didn't seem like the right answer given Chihiro's increased… _lookin'ness_ , but… it was true! "That's… why… I… Asked?" Oh shit, why're they crying?!

"I can't _believe_ you!" Chi yelled softly (yeah, right? he didn't know that was possible 'til he met them, either.) "I can't believe… I thought you were _nice!"_

"What?! Chihiro, what the fuck is—!"

But Chihiro booked it outta there before Mondo even had a chance to ask what in the hell they were talkin' 'bout. 

"...FUCK!" He screamed while slamming his locker door shut, then he kicked it over and over just for the extra noise. Well, that, and to scare everyone else out of the hallw—

"Excuse me, Mr. Oowada, but repeated kicking of the lockers is not only likely to damage them, but, more importantly, capable of damaging your own foot—"

"AHHH!" He jumped, swinging his fist in the direction of the sound that startled him… but, it never made contact.

"Missed me! Haha!" Suddenly, he could see again, and right next to his fist was _fuckin'_ Ishimaru's _smug-ass smile_ and it became incredibly clear that _no_ he's _not_ dyin' of a fever and he's _not_ fuckin' shy or any of that other _bullshit_ Mondo told himself to try and justify bein' a little nicer to this _asshole,_ this _fuckin' asshole_ who was gone for a _whole goddamn day_ because he was _so much better than everybody else_ that _he_ didn't have to follow the rules _he_ just got to enforce them and _he_ prolly read _everybody's_ permanent records and told Chihiro what a _fucked up, crazy bastard_ Mondo was and now they were never gonna talk to him again and this guy, _this fuckin' guy,_ this _nerd-ass, dork-ass bully_ had the fuckin' nerve to _mock_ him for missin' a punch when he couldn't _fuckin' see._

Mondo kicked the locker door again, treated the asshole with a "Get fuckin' bent, ya piece of shit," then bounced before he could respond with—

"Language!"

-◇⬗◆⬖◇-

Kiyotaka Ishimaru had a rather strange day. 

He didn't manage to fully calm himself until classes were already essentially over, though the quiet had helped some. He was beginning to think it might be time for a new ADHD medication, however; fighting against his brain was starting to get incredibly annoying! But, at least he _thought_ he had a plan of attack for approaching Oowada, so he got a lot of work done. That is, until a social worker came into the room with a lunch tray and he realized that he wouldn't get to talk to Fujisaki. Grr! Oh well, it wasn't like he was in the condition to be talking to people during lunch, even if helping someone out _did_ usually make him feel better. 

As thankful as he was for the food, he sort of wished that they had the foresight not to give the kid sequestered away to the autism meltdown room a sticky, overstimulating pb&j. 

After lunch, he worked on his new plan. The first step was to clear Oowada's name, as it was likely they would contact his legal guardian if they thought he was severely bullying Kiyotaka; if his home life really _wasn't_ good, that could have some drastic consequences. The next step was to find Oowada and apologize for any hassle he might've accidentally caused with the teacher, inform him about the new detention system he would allow for him, then give the prompt of school assistance. If the conversation with Oowada wasn't able to be completed, then he would find Fujisaki in either the library, the computer lab, or her dorm and explain that he needed to talk to him privately at lunch on Monday. This time, he was certain it would work! He felt significantly better now that there was a goal in sight. Which meant it was time for...

Step one: the teacher. 

"Ah! Kiyotaka! I'm glad you're back up and around."

"Haha! Yes! I'm feeling much better now, thank you, but I needed to talk to you about what happened earlier today."

"Go ahead, dear."

"Well, you see, I'm afraid there's been a misunderstanding. Mondo Oowada has not been bullying me into doing anything, I assure you! I'm terribly sorry for any confusion! As you know I have multiple neurologically diverse conditions that sometimes make me get a bit overwhelmed and difficult to communicate with," he smiled. 

"Oh… I see… well, then, why haven't you been giving him detention?"

"I intended to say earlier that I _am_ still giving him detention, but it's taken me a little to work out my approach. I'm going to be giving him quarter detentions for every minute he's late up to a full detention's worth— thus inspiring him to come sooner rather than later, even if he's already running late."

"So you're giving Oowada special treatment? Why?"

"Hm?" What did she mean why? Didn't he just say? Or maybe she could mean, "Ah, I'm sorry, but that's currently confidential until I can sort things out with him! Well… even afterwards it will likely be confidential, come to think of it."

"...Confidential, huh?"

"Yes! Again, I'm terribly sorry for any inconvenience this has caused. Mr. Oowada is not guilty of bullying me, so please don't contact his home!"

She sighed. "Kid, you're too nice for your own good."

"Hardly! I should think anyone would do the same in this situation."

Step two: Oowada.

Well, at least he was easy to find, if not in the best mood. Why was everybody just staring at him, though? Surely they must know that, "...repeated kicking of the lockers is not only likely to damage them, but, more importantly, capable of damaging your own foot—"

"AHHH!" Oowada turned, blindly flailing his arms in Kiyotaka's direction with a start. Oops! Looks like he'd accidentally stood too close to him. He swiftly moved out of the way, unfortunately all too familiar with needing to dodge punches, but fortunately in that he didn't have to put 'accidentally punching someone' as a weight on Oowada's conscience. 

"Missed me! Haha!" He smiled to try and lighten the mood now that Oowada was getting his bearings— 

"Get fuckin' bent, ya piece of shit." Oh, rats! Oowada already started leaving! 

At least he wasn't running, though there was no way he'd catch him now, plus, "Language!" Ah, that look was probably justified. Why was he so upset this afternoon? Perhaps something happened in class today after Kiyotaka had to leave… Regardless—

Step three: Fujisaki. 

It was rather odd that she wasn't in the computer lab or the library, but he figured that wasn't _too_ bizarre given that it was now the weekend. She must've been off relaxing in her dorm.

Except, no; no, she wasn't. She was pacing outside of his _own_ door, approaching the doorbell but backing away before she hit it. Why would she be nervous to talk to him? 

"Ms. Fujisaki? Did you need something?"

She yelped. "I-Ishimaru! I mean! Uh! Are you okay?"

Oh, that's right. That was why. "Yes, thank you very much for your concern! I'm sorry for worrying you!" 

"No, I mean…" she steeled herself before looking him directly in the eye and _ow, okay,_ maybe he _was_ still feeling the effects of that outburst a bit, "are you _okay?"_

"I…" Kiyotaka felt the words dying on his tongue again, he looked down to the side to avoid meeting her gaze. "Yes, I-I'm fine, Ms. Fujisaki. Thank you." 

She squeaked. It was very endearing, though he could not determine why she did so. "Oh, Ishimaru… I get it, it can be really hard to talk about…" Really? Could she be neurodivergent as well? That would be nice! "How about we go to my room and we can talk through it while I make us some tea?" Oh, well, tea did sound pretty good, his mouth still felt a bit weird from the sandwich. And that would be the perfect time to talk to Fujisaki!

"Okay!" Fujisaki's dorm was a bit messier than he would've guessed, maybe he could offer to help her clean it sometime! He was going to be on cleaning duty soon anyhow, he could help with everybody's room, probably. Other than that, there were many interesting things in Fujisaki's room, a lot of pictures on the wall, could she be a photographer? And, "Is that a telescope?"

"Hehe, yeah! I have a hard time getting it outside on my own, though… Mondo was gonna help me with it next week..." Her tone implied sadness, but that didn't make much sense given her statement. Was she simply a person who said things sadly, or was she sad but trying to hide it with a happy thought? 

Either way, "That's wonderful to hear, Fujisaki! I'm glad you'll get the chance to do some star gazing."

"Um… Ishimaru… you don't have to pretend for my sake…" 

"Uh… pretend?"

She set the tea down on the table and walked over to where he was standing. "You can tell me, alright? What Mondo said to you."

Oh? _That's_ what this is about? He would've thought she'd be used to Oowada's outbursts by now! He'd said so many harsh things over the school year to everyone, Kiyotaka learned awhile ago not to take that sort of thing personally. "Get 'effin' bent, you piece of 'crap,'" he put quotation marks around the part of the quotation that was not actually a quotation (why did people do that?) Not that he believed it was wrong to swear when quoting a source, but those sorts of words always felt… strange in his mouth, especially mixed in with the peanut butter texture. "It was pretty loud, though, I'm surprised you didn't hear!"

Fujisaki looked... confused. Maybe? "Is… that all he's said to you? S-sorry! Not to downplay it, because that is still super mean, but…"

"Well, that's all he's said to me today. He's been avoiding me for the past week so we haven't really spoken much, though I can't say I've really had too many conversations with Oowada. It was pretty mean I guess, but I know he doesn't really mean it. Oh! But that reminds me, I do need to talk to him about his detentions. I think I've come up with a system he might find helpful, but I can't seem to get ahold of him long enough to talk about it! Which, come to think of it is sort of what caused that episode this morning. Can you believe it, our teacher thought he was bullying me into not giving him any detentions! Honestly, how silly, how does she think I got into this school? But I think my current medication dosage isn't working anymore, my focus and RSD have been so out of control that—"

"S-sorry to interrupt but… Mondo's _not_ bullying you?" 

"Heavens, no! Don't worry, I made sure to go back and defend him to the teacher after class, so it should be fine now!" He smiled proudly.

"O-oh! O-oh… oh _no!_ This is _horrible!"_

"It is very hard to predict the things you say, Fujisaki."

"I yelled at Mondo earlier because I thought he was being a jerk to you! A-and I said he knew why! But he probably didn't!" Fujisaki yelled softly (how did she do that?) She pulled out her phone and made a call, then she started crying as she snapped her phone shut. "Straight to voicemail, and his box is full. Oh, Kiyotaka, I really screwed up, didn't I?" She buried her head in her hands as she let out sobs. 

This was, admittedly, not Kiyotaka's wheelhouse. But that didn't matter; one of his classmates was struggling, he was going to at least _try_ to help her. "Chihiro, if Mondo got mad at you for something you didn't do, and he yelled at you for it, you would feel pretty sad in the moment, wouldn't you?" She nodded. "But then, if he came to you afterwards and apologized after realizing it was a misunderstanding, you would forgive him, right?"

"Y-yeah… but… but… Mondo wouldn't do that, because he promised n-not to y-yell at me anymore, even if he's mad, s-so… I'm such a horrible friend!"

"Hey! No, you are not! I'm going to hold your hand, please let me know if you want me to let go." He did so and led her over to sit on the bed. "You are a great friend for Mondo! Even though I don't know you two very well, it's pretty clear. You've both been so much more involved ever since you started hanging out! Heck, you were the first person I thought of asking when it came to helping Mondo out. Plus, you were the first person the teacher thought of telling in order to get him to knock it off, too!"

She wiped her eyes with her free hand. "You… you think so?" 

"I know so! It's hard to cope when you hurt people accidentally because it hurts you as well. All mistakes work that way, they hurt for awhile, but with effort the sting will go away. And it helps when you're not alone in making that effort! How about we both agree to apologize to Mondo the first chance we get, okay? We can even do it together, if you want! That seems like a great idea, doesn't it?" 

"Uh… okay. Yeah. Okay! I'll text him to see when he's available, and then we can both apologize to him, together! Uh, but wait… Kiyotaka, why are _you_ apologizing?"

"Well, I failed to explain myself adequately earlier, which resulted in him getting into trouble with you! Sorry about that, by the way. Additionally, I haven't been diligent enough! There's a private matter that I've needed to speak to him about all week and I still haven't asked him about it!"

"A.. private matt…?" Fujisaki interrupted herself with a giggle as her face reddened with embarrassment. "Oh, duh. Of course. That makes a lot of sense now." She squeezed his hand. "I think that'd be easier for you to do after he's gotten to know you a little better. He's a lot more shy than he lets on."

"Ah! Chihiro! You're absolutely right! I can't believe I didn't even think about that before!" He'd always tried to lump it into the detention discussion, but Oowada would probably feel much better talking about it in a more personal setting! Kiyotaka had forgotten that the people here were significantly more willing to do that then people at his old school were! 

"Hehe, Taka, you're so silly! Is this your first time?"

"Well, no, but it usually ends with me getting punched in the face, so I've been trying to rework my approach."

Her smile dropped. "W-What?! Punched in the face?! Why?!"

"Oh, people aren't usually very… receptive of the idea most of the time. Don't worry too much about me! I can take it, I just try my best to avoid violence when I can!" 

She squeezed his hand again. "That's terrible!" She let go and stood up dramatically, clenching her fists in determination while looking at him with big, watery eyes. "I'm gonna do whatever I can to help you, Taka! I promise it! On my honor as a man!" 

"Really? Thank you!" She must really care about Oowa— wait, "Pardon?"

"Oh, uh, right… uh… I'm kinda a girl _but_ I'm _also_ kinda a boy…"

"Oh! Wonderful, what are your pronouns? Mine are he/him!"

Chihiro smiled. "They/them... mostly... but some days they change. I'll let you know if that happens! Do you, um… do you maybe wanna head to the dining hall with me?"

"That sounds lovely!" They giggled and grabbed his hand, dragging him off to the cafeteria where they talked over dinner together. 

All things considered, it wasn't a bad day at all. Just a very, _very_ strange day. 

-◇⬗◆⬖◇-

Mondo Oowada had one of the shittiest fuckin' days of his life.

Which was impressive, 'cause his life was basically 100% shitty days. He didn't even have the time to blow off steam before headin' home 'cause his phone died and he needed to charge it before goin' out with the gang. Meanin' he was gonna be all huffy and pissy in front of Daiya and—

"Why the FUCK haven't you been answerin' your goddamn phone, ya piece a shit!?" _Why the fuck was Daiya mad too?!?!_

"It died. What's up?"

"What's up?! What's _up?!"_ Daiya balked. "Gotta 'nother interestin' call from your teach today, wanna know what she had ta fuckin' say to me? She told me that _my_ little bro, who I raised to be _a man of fuckin' honor,_ was beatin' up a _special kid_ in order ta _cheat his way through high school."_

**_"WHAT?!"_ **

"YEAH. EXACTLY. THAT'S! WHAT! _I!_ FUCKIN'! SAID! 'Parently _your_ ass got caught by the hall monitor and when they went to talk ta the kid he _broke down fuckin' cryin'_ and had to go to the meltdown room 'cause he was so scareda what you'd do to 'im if ya found out— then he _begged_ the whole day long for them not ta fuckin' bust ya! So what exactly do ya have to say for your goddamn self 'fore I _ground_ your ass for a year?!" 

Mondo's stomach dropped. He hated _nothing_ more than he hated disappointing Daiya. 

"That's— That's fuckin' _BULLSHIT_ , that's what I gotta say for myself _!_ You don't think I'd actually _do_ that, do you?!" He could puke. "They're out to get me! They're fuckin' _LIARS_ and they're OUT TA FUCKIN' GET ME!"

"Dude, you're gonna have to do better than th—" 

"OH, FUCK _OFF,_ DAIYA. IS IT SO _FUCKIN'_ HARD FOR YOU TO FUCKIN' LISTEN TA ME FOR ONCE IN YA GODDAMN LIFE? I TOLD YA I WOULDN'T FUCKIN' DO THAT, 'CAUSE I FUCKIN' _DIDN'T._ I BEEN DOING ALLA MY HOMEWORK BY MY FUCKIN' _SELF_ AND I AIN'T BEATIN' UP NOBODY, 'SPECIALLY NOT A _CRIP!"_ Mondo slammed the front door behind him as he stormed outta the house and back onto his bike.

Daiya opened the door behind him. "Hey! Get your ass back here! Don't you dare—" but it was too late, Mondo was off. 

To think he thought for one second he was gonna try 'n be nice to that fuckin'... That fuckin'.... That fuckin' _jerk! Fuckin' liar-ass Ishimaru!_ Cryin's for babies, Mondo, don't you dare fuckin' cry! It'll smudge your goddamn eyeliner. Was that what he had the teacher tell Chihiro, too?! God, no wonder they wanted fuck all to do with Mondo anymore. If Mondo _himself_ found out one of his guys was beatin' on a fuckin' _sped,_ he'd knock his teeth in without question. How could _fuckin' Ishimaru_ even _come up_ with somethin' like that?! And skip the rest of the day, only to come back and fuckin' _gloat?!_ How _low_ could somebody _get_. 

_Ding-dong._

"Boss? Izzat you? Whaddya doin' at my ap—" 

"Tell Daiya where I'm at and you're a dead man," he stormed past Michi and into his bathroom, slammin' the door shut behind him and lockin' it before plopping to the ground. He didn't bother turnin' the light on, that'd just make his growing headache worse, but he did lift the seat in case his stomach made good on its threat of hurling. 

"...Aight, but if you break somethin' in there I'mma be real pissed off," Takemichi called back to him some time later. 

What Mondo needed was a plan. Ridin' with the guys s'prolly a no go for tonight, so playin' it like the reason he was in here was 'cause he was feelin' sick was gonna be his best call. Not like it was really a _lie,_ just wasn't the _whole_ truth. That'd work on the gang, but that still left Michi, who was a curious, nosey little bastard that could tell when people weren't tellin' him somethin'. Well, maybe he could say Daiya was gettin' on his case 'bout school? Also not a lie, but that would defo make Michi suspicious. Daiya didn't exactly have much room to get off on bein' strict 'bout schoolwork; even if he _did,_ he wouldn't. On his case about _causin' trouble_ in school? He'd wanna know what kinda trouble. He could say fuckin' hall monitor won't leave me alone, that'd cover it without bein' specific. Maybe it'd even make it clear that this wasn't _his own fuckin' fault._ Then, while talkin' to Michi they could work out how to approach Daiya. Or how to sneak back into their house without breakin' somethin'. That could work…

"Oi, dipshit. Don't mean ta be rude, but don'tcha gotta dorm you could be doin' this in? I gotta get goin' if ya outta commish tonight, 'n if ya still in there when pops gets home he's gonna freak 'n think ya stealin' shit." 

"Fuck!" He groaned, before he realized that Michi was a _goddamn motherfuckin' gigantic brained genius._ He didn't spend the night there a lot, but he kept some necessary shit in his dorm in case he needed to. New plan. Go back to school, charge phone, tell Daiya he's safe, find Chihiro, try to give them the stitch, kick _fuckin'_ Ishimaru's ass if he's got time. 

"Boss—"

"I heard ya Michi, I'll get outta your hair."

Step one: school.

Hope's Peak looked weird this late. It wasn't curfew yet, but a lot of the lights were off in the halls. It took him a minute to remember where the dorms actually _were,_ next to the dining hall? Yeah, like, right next to the dining hall. That checked out. 

Thank _fuck_ the doors had nameplates on them instead of room numbers. 

The first thing he did once he was inside was plug in his phone, the second was make sure he had a toothbrush and deodorant here, the third was fall back on the bed. It'd be a minute before he could turn his phone back on, maybe he could squeeze in a nap to alleviate his headache a li—

 _Grumble grumble._ Oh, shit, he hadn't eaten since lunch, had he? And it was already… well, fuck, there wasn't a clock in here. Past dinner time, right? He'd been wallowing in Michi's bathroom for awhile, and Michi's apartment was kinda a trek from both Mondo's place and the school, not to mention the dicking around Mondo'd done accidentally on purpose while tryin' to remember the directions through his cloud of anger. The sky was pretty dark, too; the boys were out raisin' hell by now, for sure. Another growl from his stomach, he looked down at his phone. Nice solid 0%. Might as well get some chow. 

Step ~~four~~ two: _fuckin' Ishimaru._

The goddamn _second_ he stepped outta his room he felt eyes back on him. Could Mondo not get _five fuckin' minutes_ of _peace_ on this goddamn campus without that _bastard_ ruining it? Whatever, maybe he'd go a-fuckin'-way if Mondo kept on walking to the dining hall without acknowledging him.

'Cept, no, no he fuckin' didn't, 'cause why fuckin' would he, it was _fuckin' Ishimaru._ Not like the kid allegedly had four million gajillion other responsibilities that should've taken priority over stalking Mondo when he hadn't done _shit!_ He got halfway through the dining hall before he couldn't take it anymore and did an aggressive pivot. 

_"WHADDYA FUCKIN' WANT?!"_

"Langu—"

"Ishimaru I swear to fuckin' fuck if your bastard ass fuckin' says fuckin' language to me one more goddamn motherfuckin' ti—"

"What are you doing here, Oowada?" 

"The fuck's that s'posed to mean? I'm gettin' somethin' to eat."

"No, that's not— I mean—"

"Oh, I get it, you thought I was here to vandalize somethin' or some shit? Maybe snag some free food and eat it in front of starving orphans? Oh wait, I shouldn't be giving you more ideas for shit you can _make up_ about me."

Those giant-ass eyes of his gave away Ishimaru's every thought, and right now his every thought was 'oh, fuck.' As it should be. "Ah, right. I can see how you'd come to that conclusion—"

"THAT'S REALLY WHATCHA GOT TO FUCKIN' SAY!?"

"No, it's—"

"OH, _CAN IT_ , DICKHOLE. I DON'T WANNA HEAR ANY OF THAT BACKPEDALING CRAP, YOU ALREADY LET ME KNOW _LOUD AND FUCKIN' CLEAR_ THAT THIS WHOLE 'MORAL COMPASS' SHIT'S AN ACT."

"An _act?_ An _ACT?!_ Mr. Oowada, I understand you're upset, but that doesn't give you the right to silence me and insinuate that my life's work is fraudulent!" 

"SILENCE YOU? OH, YOU HAVEN'T _SEEN_ ME TRYIN' TO SILENCE YOU. HOW'D YA LIKE A JAB TO THE THROAT, HUH? MAYBE A BROKEN JAW'S MORE YOUR STYLE?"

"VIOLENCE AS A RESOLUTION TO ONE'S DISPUTES IS THE COWARD'S WAY OUT OF HAVING TO WORK HARD TO COME TO A COMPROMISE!"

"OH? SO I'M A _COWARD_ NOW? THAT'S _RICH_ , COMIN' FROM _YOU."_

"YOU _ARE!"_

"Uh… guys… you alright?"

"FUCK O— oh, hey Makoto."

"Perfect timing!" 

"P-perfect timing for… what, exactly?" Mondo was pretty sure Makoto was still scared of him from the whole 'accidentally punching him in the face on the first day' thing, if how he was acting now was anything to go by.

 _"This_ asshole's been breathin' down my fuckin' neck tryin' to catch me out on doin' bad shit to fuel his fuckin' God complex—!"

"And _this… a-hole_ has been avoiding me deliberately and refuses to listen to a single word I have to say because he can't handle other people not being scared into tolerating his delinquency!"

"Uh…"

"So we need you to moderate for us!" 

"Like… you need me to tell each of you the other person's side in a way that's easier for you to understand?"

"HELL NO! WE NEED YOU TO REF FOR US DUKIN' IT OUT!"

"YES, MAKOTO, YOU MUST MAKE SURE THAT WE BOTH PERFORM FAIRLY IN THIS CHALLENGE!"

"Wait! You two're gonna fight?! Like, with your fists!?!?!" 

"There's a bathhouse next to the dorms; it's got a sauna, right?"

"I see! A simple test of endurance, then!"

"Guys, I don't like where this is headi— AH!" They each took hold of one of Naegi's armpits and dragged him along to the sauna to witness their fearsome brawl.

After an uncomfortable hour of Mondo sittin' next to (the surprisingly _ripped)_ Ishimaru, starvin' half to death through the sticky, sweaty heat in his drenched uniform, Makoto decided to ditch them in favor of makin' it back before curfew. For most people, that'd prolly be a low point.

For Mondo, it was when his day finally started takin' a turn for the better.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! Thank you very much for reading, I hoped you liked it! As always I'd love to hear your thoughts on this chapter, and hope to see you soon for the next one! Have a stupendous day!


	3. G.I.N.A.S.F.S

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tw for internalized homophobia and casual ableism

Mondo Oowada _had_ to know what he was doing to Kiyotaka Ishimaru.

"I'll push you… right up to the… gates of hell!" 

Getting in his face, so he could see his light eyes contrast with the dark smudge of the makeup framing them. Sweating, panting, with his voice low and exhausted. He _had_ to _know._

"Tomorrow morning you can spread my… my legend…" Okay, Kiyotaka might not've been the _best_ at social cues, but like… this _had_ to be on purpose! 

…It could've been a taunt— homophobes did that sometimes. Well, fine! Then he'd taunt him right back! 

"Ha! Come tomorrow morning… you'll fall down in front of me… down on your knees… I'll show you where to do it!" He mustered up as much intensity as he could, getting right back in Oowada's face at him— it was a shame that the heat from the sauna was making his voice crack, though really, he should've been grateful; it helped distract from what he was sure was an incredibly clumsy delivery of what was supposed to sound suave and cocky. 

Oowada smirked at him. "Big talk… comin' from someone… whose face is about to explode!"

God, this was _not_ a good time to only be wearing a towel. 

"R-right back a-at ya!" He nervously rebounded, thanking the heat once again for hiding what would've otherwise been an obvious blush. 

What the heck was that!? Was that what flirting felt like!? That… that couldn't've been what this was, right?! How would Oowada even know that Kiyotaka was… an available option to flirt with! And didn't Oowada loudly complain in the hallways about his failures when it came to flirting with _girls?_ Kiyotaka had lost track of their actual volume long ago, but that was probably the least shout-y conversation they'd had together thus far! Oowada didn't seem nervous at _all_ , in fact he almost looked like he was having fun! That's— and— look at him, Kiyotaka, the boy's just _not_ _gay!_ It was rude to judge a book by its cover and he knew that gay people were everywhere, so that was a bad thought rooted in deep personal bias, but… c'mon! Oowada's masculinity was more fragile than a glass toothpick! Even if he _was_ gay, he wouldn't go around flirting with every man he saw mostly naked in the sauna!

Oowada said something.

"Hm? Sorry, I was lost in thought"

"I asked why you're always fuckin' lookin' at me like that?!"

"I'm... looking at you? Oh! So I am... My apologies... my ADHD has been a terror to keep in check recently… Wait... _always?_ What do you me—"

"Dude, what! _You_ are _not_ ADHD. I mean... I wouldn't exactly call you _chill,_ but... y'ain't hyper. And you're always focused on… studying and shit."

"My medical files would… disagree with your surface level diagnosis."

"Wait, you meant... like… _forreal?!"_ Why did that shock him so much!?

"I always figured... as much was obvious... I'm not exactly one to use much slang, Oowada... even if I was... I wouldn't trivialize a medical condition!"

"Right... forgot about that stick shoved up your ass for a second." 

...He _had_ to know what he was doing.

"You all may laugh... but having a code to follow... makes life a lot easier!" 

Oowada scoffed. "The hell it does! The expectation to live up to it… I keep tryin' to… but I keep fuckin' it up... Swear to God, it feels like… like everybody on the fuckin' planet's got some memo... 'bout what to do and what not to do... that nobody ever bothered to give me..."

"...That's… that's exactly what I meant, actually..."

"...Huh?"

"Life is easier when I have rules to follow... because I haven't 'got the memo,' either... They give me an outline for how to act that other people don't need... I have autism, so it can feel like... without that rigidity... I don't have any grasp on what people expect from me, which makes things... way more complicated than they need to be." Mondo looked at him like his heart was breaking. It was a bit conflicting, actually. On the one hand, "It's okay! I don't... need pity. I'm not sad, my brain is just... wired differently, it's what makes me... unique!" But on the other, he almost didn't mind; he got the sense that, _for on_ ce in his life, somebody who was providing their sympathies actually _understood_ what he was going through. 

"But aren't you... always talking about taking the hard path? It... doesn't seem like you to do somethin'... 'cause it's the easy way."

"Well, to be fair... I started thinking about it this way when I was... a little kid... However, you're right to ask that! You... could hardly consider someone who blindly follows _any_ rules given to them... a 'moral compass!' I think there's... more value to be had in direct discussion than necessarily in following the rules to the letter... I myself have accommodations with the school that permit me to do things... that would typically be considered 'against the rules,' such as being able to... take my classes in another room." Oh, dear, Mondo looked even more upset now. "Plus... the venn diagram of that which is moral... and that which is legal... isn't a perfect circle, or anything resembling it... Feeding the hungry is always moral, even if it's not always legal, for example... For me, I have the actual rules to tell me what people expect me to do, but… I consider that which is moral to be the overall 'rule,' even if it goes against them... that can be a very difficult thing to figure out and act upon in many scenarios… Additionally… I wouldn't exactly call it 'easy' to be... generally hated by most people in the school."

"So everything you enforce... you have something to back it up? Like... in-depth detailed shit."

"Yes!"

"Can… can I hear some of your reasons? You're... really good at explainin'… shit like this..."

"Uh... sure!" Kiyotaka beamed. That was certainly… new. Even his father, God bless him, shied away from asking direct questions about his special interests, especially ethics. 

They went on like that, with Mondo asking occasional questions and offering rebuttals to points he disagreed on— some of which were as thoroughly thought out as Kiyotaka's own arguments. He was a very active listener. Throughout the conversation, they learned more about each other's personal lives. It was… nice; there wasn't any other word for it, no caveats at all, for once, he was doing something that was just plain _nice._ He was glad to learn that Mondo's home situation wasn't as bad as he feared, at least not currently; Kiyotaka wondered if this 'Daiya' was anything like his younger brother. 

At some point, they gave up on the sauna dream. Mondo had to help Kiyotaka get out, as all the sensory information his body had been ignoring suddenly crashed into him the moment the adrenaline wore off (he hated it when that happened; it was almost worse than normal sensory overload, at least _that_ got it done and over with.) They kept talking as they washed off the grime from the sauna, they kept talking as they both headed back to Kiyotaka's dorm, they kept talking as he made a meal to share with Mondo (who he learned had yet to eat this evening), and even after that they kept talking. After every momentary separation, Mondo's body boomeranged back to his arms so they could keep the conversation close, make it more intimate than it felt when they were apart— he _had_ to know what he was doing to Kiyotaka. His jaw hurt from all the talking and laughing and smiling, they both stopped talking and he didn't even care, because now they were tangled together on the floor, leaning against Kiyotaka's bed, silently playing with each other's hair and how could it be _possible_ that he was misreading the situation.

"I'm sorry. If you thought I was trying to bully you. Earlier. I really wasn't, bro."

So he _was_ doing it on purpose! What a relief. This was why people should be up-front about things! "That's fine, it was my fault for misjudging you."

"The teacher called Daiya and told him what you said, and that you were really shaken up about the whole thing, and at the time I was really pissed off, 'cause I thought you were makin' shit up, and I didn't really connect any of the dots, and—" Oh. Nevermind. He _wasn't_ doing it on purpose, he was talking about this morning.

"Ah, sorry! I asked her not to do that!! In fact, the reason I followed you to the dining hall was to apologize. Really, it's all my fault; because I was taking so long with your detentions, she thought I was being intimidated by you—"

Mondo snorted, "You're one of, like, three damn people in the whole school who's _not!"_

"I know! But when I tried to explain it to her... the idea that she thought I could be so easily pushed around into _failing_ to do my duties— the sensation of rejection made me feel sick, overwhelmed; I couldn't defend myself or you properly."

"I get that feeling too, sometimes... like, if Daiya's upset at me for somethin'." Mondo's expression curdled then soured. "Bro, that teacher never fuckin' listens to me either! I try askin' her questions 'bout the homework, but she always gives me this weird-ass look, like I'm fuckin' askin' her if the sky is brown!"

"Mondo…" Kiyotaka began without thinking, before realizing that this was a very dangerous line of questioning to improv. Though he was having a lovely night with him, he had to remember that this was still 'punch people in the face if they insinuate he's anything close to what was stereotypically seen as weak' guy. Having Mondo's beautiful blue eyes on him didn't help much in the way of letting him quickly crank out a script. "...Have you considered that you might be neurodivergent?"

"Uhhh… What does that… mean?"

"Sorry, I forget that that's not a common word sometimes!" He wasn't sorry at all, but he said it so that Mondo wouldn't realize that this was a clever ploy to buy some time. This was a simple matter of regurgitating a definition he had given probably hundreds of times by now. "Basically it's the umbrella term for things like autism and ADHD, in addition to many other disorders such as dyslexia, OCD, Tourettes, really the list is quite long."

"Well, I mean…" Mondo squirmed and looked away from him. "I haven't really thought about it before. Up 'til now, I had this image in my mind about that kinda shit which, uh," he glanced back briefly with embarrassment, "I'm realizing now was… pretty wrong. And God knows I've never been to a doctor for anything that wasn't prolly gonna kill me, so…"

Kiyotaka rubbed his new… companion's back. People tried to reassure _him_ like this all the time, maybe Mondo would find it helpful? "It's okay if you don't have an answer, but… thinking about it would be a good idea! If you find yourself relating to things that I describe as symptoms, it could be worth looking into!" 

Mondo leaned into the touch, giving a much smaller, more sheepish smile than his usual cocksure grin. "I'll… I'll ask Daiya 'bout it, I guess. Must've been _somethin'_ my folks were good for, maybe there's an old medical file or whatever lyin' arou— oh shit! _Daiya!"_ His expression immediately dropped as he shot up and sprinted out of the room. Well, their rooms _were_ right next to each other; that hardly counted as running in the halls. 

Kiyotaka got up, taking that as a sign to get ready for sleep. Only while brushing his teeth did he realize just how bizarre this night had been; for God's sake, they'd both been mostly undressed during all of that! He didn't want to get his hopes up for Mondo ever talking to him again, though; one night together wasn't enough to eliminate their status as natural nemeses, no matter how much Kiyotaka wanted more than that. At least they'd increased the amount of respect they had for one another, maybe they could playfully banter back and forth in the halls on occasion; that might brighten things up around here! He turned off the lights and laid down. Today was nice while it lasted, but he supposed this evening had to come to an end eventually, reality was waiting for him to get back from his short reprieve. It was a shame he couldn't've given Mondo a more proper goodb—

"Yeah, I know you were worried!" Kiyotaka's door burst open. How could he have forgotten to lock it? "I already _said_ I was sorry. If you'd've let me _explain_ the misunderstanding in the _first_ place— well, anyway, doesn't matter now, 'cause I made up with him and we're havin' a slumber party," Mondo flopped down on the bed, making it bounce and wave like the ocean. He once again closed the gap between their bodies and snuggled up to Kiyotaka, "Ain't that right, Taka?" He smirked.

Mondo _must've_ known what he was doing. He _must've._

-◇⬗◆⬖◇-

Kiyotaka Ishimaru had _no_ _idea_ what he was doing to Mondo Oowada.

"Of course!" 

That smile so close to his face, the joy that shone through those big, auburn doe eyes of his. The hoarseness in his voice from a day of conversation, weighed down deep by pre-sleep tiredness. It was _doin'_ stuff he couldn't _describe._

"Can I have the phone? I'd like to apologize to Daiya for any trouble this situation caused." Hot. Damn. He really cared that much? He was such a sweetie. He just… _adored_ him, so much. How could he not? How _hadn't_ he? Ten minutes in to actually _talking_ to the guy, he realized he couldn't go back to the way things were before. 

"If you wanna, Taka, but it's not your fault." 

Taka smiled at him. "Thank you, it means a lot to hear you say that!" _Such_ a _sweetheart!_ "Still, I would like to get to know the people who are important to you, because you're important to me!" 

God, this was _not_ a good time to be in nothin' but boxers.

"O-okay." He responded dumbly as he handed the phone over. Hopefully it was dark enough in here that Taka couldn't see his blushing face and…

Wait, why was Mondo _blushing?_ And why was he self conscious about being in his underwear while he was wrapped around Taka and thinking about how adorable he was and how he was his sweet sweetie sweetheart and how he wanted to hug him and squeeze him and kiss him on the cheek and maybe even the— _no!_ No, Jesus, the fuck was that? Man, he must've really been gettin' desperate. There's no way he… that's… 

Oh, for christssake, he was _Mondo fuckin' Oowada!_ He was more masculine than a stag on steroids! Just 'cause he'd never managed to _snag_ a pretty babe didn't mean he didn't _like_ the idea of havin' one! It was just his brain. Bein' all tired and lonely and shit. Mondo wasn't a _fuckin'_ _queer_ and even if he _was_ it wouldn't matter because neither was…

...Kiyotaka _fuckin'_ Ishimaru. He really _didn't_ know what he was doin' to Mondo, did he? He already said that he didn't get social shit, and if he ever found out… he'd probably freak, right? Homos were definitely a big no-no when it came to 'morals,' Mondo knew _that_ much. They didn't have the self restraint needed to take the 'difficult path' and not give into their pervy urges— But, that didn't matter, right? Cause Mondo _wasn't fuckin' gay,_ so Taka wouldn't have to _ditch him 'cause he hated his disgusting guts,_ so it would be fine. People platonically got physical all the time; hell, if friends with benefits could be a thing, friends who hugged and kissed each other sometimes ain't so drastic. 

But… there were other secrets, too; Taka prolly wanted to _meet_ Daiya if what he said just now was true, which meant seeing what Mondo was like _outside_ of the comfort of privacy; even worse, it meant Taka learning about _the accident._ About how Mondo ruined the life of anyone he ever cared about and how he was too weak to defend the brother that saved him from the insults the members of the gang _he'd started for him_ spewed about the guy behind his back. Daiya was prolly tellin' Taka right now 'bout how Mondo ruined his whole night, makin' him worry so much. _Dad_ woulda; they weren't the same person by a longshot, but Daiya _was_ still raised by the douche, it was possible.

Taka said something.

"Hm?" 

"I said he wants to say goodnight, sleepyhead!" 

"Oh— night Daiya!" 

"Yes! Goodnight Mr. Oowada!"

Daiya's sleep-stained voice laughed over the tinny speaker. "I told ya, Kiyotaka, just Daiya's fine. G'night, kids, glad you're both doin' okay. And oi! Mondo! Dumbass! I love ya, you got it? Don't go thinkin' that I don't just 'cuz I'm stupid and can't shut my trap sometimes." 

"Daiiiyaaa, duuude, don't be cheesy in fronta Taka, man…" his embarrassment earned him a laugh from both men. He groaned and hid his face in the space between Taka's neck and shoulder (was there a name for that part of the body, or was it part of one of those two other things? Whatever, it hid his face well enough.) "Love ya, bro," he finally replied.

Taka must not've been expectin' the vibration from his voice, 'cause the arm that was around Mondo reflexively clamped down and the other went to his mouth to stop a startled 'ngh!' Right, he had to remember that Taka had limits on how much surprise 'sensory input' he could take. 

"See ya later, man!" Daiya hung up, Mondo took his phone back and shut it off.

"Hey, Taka, sorry 'bout that, bro. Didn't mean to over… to stim… to fuck with your shit. If that's a bad spot for you, I can avoid it from now on..."

"Huh? Oh! Oh, no, you didn't, sorry if I worried you! I was… startled, that's all! It's actually quite comforting!" 

_Mondo was goin' insane._ "If you say so," he smirked before straddling Taka and putting his head back in his neck-shoulder area. "How does this feel?" His lips brushed against Taka's neck as he talked and _Jesus, what the fuck was this guy doin' to Mondo?_

Taka hummed and wrapped his free arm around him, carding it up his back 'til it landed in his hair. This unintentionally had the effect of nudging Mondo even closer, and _how did he not know what he was doing._ Would Taka notice a light peck? Would Mondo be able to stop himself from giving one? "It feels good, like I'm under a weighted blanket."

"Is that a uh… uhm… stim… thingy?" Taka squirmed under him as he talked, but held Mondo's head in place against his neck; it was really hard to tell if this was making him uncomfortable or not.

"Y-yeah! It is! Good memory, Mondo!" Mondo closed his eyes to get his damn self under control. Such a small compliment, but from Taka it made him wanna forget about morals and manliness and just go crazy. He was so… so… 

Cute! That's it, it wasn't that Mondo was _gay,_ Taka was just _cute—_ like a puppy or a kitty. It wasn't gay to think your new friend was cute! He thought in passing that Chi was cute, like, all the goddamn time! This was the more intense version of that! God knows that when Chuck was still around, he nuzzled that poor pooch half to death, this was _exactly_ the same thing! Ugh, what a relief. Now he could rest in peace.

Bad phrasing. Really bad phrasing. An image of a pile of parts that vaguely looked like a motorcycle flashed across his mind, strewn over a table that morphed into pavement. Burnt skin and burnt rubber overtook the smell of Taka's soap and _do not_ _fucking cry on Taka Mondo. Men do not fucking cry._ You shouldn't have to keep _fucking_ reminding yourself not to be such a goddamn _wimp_ all the time you _co_ —wa...rd?

Taka's hand moved out of his hair and onto his cheek, caressing back and forth gently, clearly unable to gauge how hard to press. His face rested on top of Mondo's head. It was probably a trick from his fucked-up, tired mind, but it almost felt like his lips were pressing into Mondo's hairline, ever so softly. Taka's other hand went to find one of Mondo's, which he now realized were rather embarrassingly latched onto Taka's sides. "Is this too much?"

He _didn't know._ He _couldn't._ He was concerned about Mondo's stim whatever, because he was a good fuckin' person who had problems with it himself and didn't wanna impose on someone else that might be in a similar situation. And Mondo couldn't pretend that wasn't what he was doing, because that would be _weird,_ but at least it was nice to feel butterflies in his chest instead of bees, even if their fluttering was misguided. He took a big, deep breath in. "No, bro, you're perfect." That gave Taka a lot more confidence to his touch. They laid there silently for a while.

Would Taka still hold him like this if he _knew?_

About any of it. All of it. He might. He might not. Prolly not. But maybe…

"Hey, Taka?"

"Hm?" Oops, he sounded really sleepy. This was a bad time, he should back out. He shoulda thought this through more, he should think of somethin' else to say.

_Don't be a coward._

"Uh, well… can you promise me somethin'? I'll promise it back."

"What is it?" A lot more alert now. Not upset, but alert. He needed to think this through quickly and carefully, but that was gonna be a lot harder now that those beautiful eyes were back on him.

"I just… can't help but get this feelin', this feelin' like we're soul—" _don't say mates don't say mates don't say mates,_ "—brothers," _nailed it._ "And… I dunno 'bout you, but I don't think I could go back to the way things were before… it's, I mean, I guess I'm worried, cause we're different in a lot of ways even though now we know we're pretty similar, and—" Taka squeezed Mondo's hand. Right. Get to the point. Waffling would make him chicken out. "I wanna promise that, no matter what, I'll be here for ya. You can tell me anythin', and even if it's somethin' that maybe you don't think I'd like, I promise to be willin' to at least hear ya out on it 'n keep bein' besties after. An' I hope you feel the same way 'bout me." Cool, okay, his foot was kinda in his mouth there, but he'd only gotten a _little_ bit louder, as far as he could tell. 

Taka moved his head down so that they could see each other's faces. His eyes were full of determination. "Mondo Oowada, I promise, on my honor as a man, that no matter what, I'll be here for you; that you can tell me anything, even if you don't think I'd like it, and I'll at least hear you out; that, regardless of anything, I'll keep being your 'soul brother!'" Mondo smiled. What a dork. He should kiss him. No he shouldn't! _Fuck!_ Just 'cause they promised didn't mean he had to go exposin' all his embarrassing thoughts right a-fuckin'-way! God, Mondo, stop bein' a goddamn idiot—

Taka, at some point while he wasn't paying attention, had closed the gap between them, brushed his hair back with his hand, and planted a soft kiss on his forehead. "Good night, bro," he sighed before slipping into sleep.

A good night kiss. Jesus. He _adored_ this kid.

Taka really had _no idea_ what he was doin' to him. 

-◇⬗◆⬖◇-

Mondo Oowada was a very weird boy. Pretty lucky on Kiyotaka Ishimaru's end, given that _he_ was a very weird boy, as well. 

The relief he felt when Mondo promised to still be by his side come morning was unparalleled to anything he'd felt before— though, he had to admit, he was getting some… mixed signals.

Which, to be fair to Mondo, happened to be something Kiyotaka got frequently, thus it was more than likely a 'him' problem. But… well… 

It was simply peculiar to him, that Mondo would kiss his neck then announce him to be his 'brother,' but, hey, what did he know? His knowledge pool of friendships and romantic relationships was _incredibly_ shallow, and he somehow got the feeling that Mondo's approach to either wasn't going to be very similar to that which he'd read about in classic literature. He found most romances in fiction to be rather... simplistic, regardless. They were always straight, they were always about horrible men and characterless women— it was hardly relatable, especially for a gay boy who found forming good relationships at all to be an incredibly complicated task. Maybe he could ask someone he knew what last night's actions meant, but who? If it _was_ romantic, he didn't want to out Mondo, but if they didn't know it was explicitly _Mondo_ doing this, then how could they definitively say his behavior indicated one thing over the other? If there was _anything_ Kiyotaka knew about how other people thought about things, he knew that it was, unfortunately, _differently._ One man's platonic could easily be another's romantic, and to assume otherwise would be foolish, as nice as it would be to be able to make such general calls. 

He needed a shower. And some breakfast. And to give Mondo another kiss on the forehead before he left the bed. It was still a bit odd to see the boy with his hair down, but it looked nice. The dress code suggested hair that was shorter, but if Kiyotaka was right about his neurodivergent theory, he'd wager that Mondo wasn't very comfortable having his hair that way. It made his normal style seem a lot less goofy. 

In the shower, he tried to figure out who to go to. Asahina was very kind, a member of GSA, and usually willing to help with things, but she wouldn't be good at keeping it secret, plus he didn't think she knew Mondo very well. Kuwata knew Mondo but didn't like Kiyotaka much, not to mention he wasn't sure where he stood on the 'gay' situation. Actually, he wasn't sure where _most_ of his class stood on it. Fukawa seemed adamantly against homosexuality (and socializing), she was definitely out... No, the only one he could say for certain was pro-gay was Asahina, all others that came to mind he didn't really have evidence for other than momentary blips on his 'gaydar.' Wait, actually, he did know _one_ other person in the LGBT+ community… _and_ they were friends with Mondo! Ah! Perfect! He'd have to ask them later, maybe he wouldn't say anything direct about Mondo's _exact_ behavior, but someone who's known him for longer would definitely know how touchy-feely he could get if it were a typical—

_Ding-dong._

Oh, dear! The door! Wow, he'd done most of his morning routine on autopilot. He finished buttoning his shirt as he went to answer. Well, speak of the programmer!

"Ah, good morning, Chihi—"

"T-Taka, this is really bad!" How funny, they both gave him the same nickname! "M-Mondo still hasn't responded to my texts or calls and I d-don't know what to do! I-I think I r-really biffed it," tears welled in their eyes.

"Why don't you just talk to him in person?" 

"Well, I guess his house _is_ pretty close by… we _could_ walk there after breakfast..."

Blast! He completely forgot to tell them. "That won't be necessary, Chihiro! He's actually here right now!"

"What?! But, he never stays here!" They quickly went over to press Mondo's neighboring doorbell. 

"Uh—"

"Takaaaa, close the fuckin' doooor, broooo," a pair of arms slid around his midsection as a head landed on his shoulder. "I'm gettin' coooold," Mondo whined. Instinctively, Kiyotaka looked over to him, raised one hand to Mondo's face and placed the other around the one cradling his tummy. "Why're you starin' out at an empty hall anyyyywaaaayy?" He swayed back and forth, presumably for emphasis. It made Kiyotaka giggle.

"Good morning, bro! It's not empty, actually! Chihiro just went over to your door! But you're right, it was incredibly rude of me not to invite them inside—"

"Chi's here?" Mondo's arms dropped and he backed away and _good heavens Mondo hadn't gotten dressed yet._ No wonder he was embarrassed! 

"Yes, it might be wise to put some clothes on."

"No shit, smart-ass," Mondo said, ruffling his hair to show he didn't mean it maliciously, before getting his clothes and going into the bathroom. 

"Uh, Taka… c-can I talk to you in the hall for a sec…"

He turned back to face Chihiro, confused. "Are you sure you wouldn't rather come inside?" 

"I will after he, uh, y'know…"

"Oh! I understand!" Taka exited his room, closing the door behind him.

"S-so, when you said Mondo was… here… you meant… as in… _here?"_

"Haha, Yes! I was about to say as much before he made that obvious. I'm really sorry! I know we said we were going to apologize to him together, but I saw him last night and—"

"I'll say you did!" They 'shouted.' 

"I'm sorry! Are you mad?" 

"Eep! S-sorry, no? I meant it more in a 'good for you' way…" 

"Ha! That's a relief! It certainly was good for me!" 

"B-because… you finally got to talk to him about your, um, 'private matter,' right?"

"Oh, yes! That too! Your advice worked wonderfully, he was much more comfortable after we got to know each other! You have no idea how relieved I was to hear he'd merely been having homework troubles that were interfering with his sleep schedule— Daiya seems to be a great role model for him! I got to talk to him briefly last night, have you met him before? He said Mondo and I sound like two peas in a pod! I think that's a really good sign that our friendship will only continue to grow stronger!"

Chihiro's face dropped. Ever the emotional enigma, they were. "O-oh. But… what about…"

The door opened. An arm slipped around his shoulder, a looser, lazier version of the vice-grip he'd already become accustomed to. "Oi, whatcha doin' out here? Thought you were comin' inside." 

"Hello, bro!" Kiyotaka smiled at him to indicate he was happy at his return, "Chihiro was uncomfortable with being in the room while you were changing!" 

Mondo shot them a perplexed eyebrow for some strange reason. Perhaps leading what amounted to a men's locker room on wheels made one forget that some people had boundaries. 

"R-right, well…" 

Kiyotaka checked his watch. "It looks like it's time for us to meet up in the dining hall for breakfast. Shall we be on our way?" They began walking.

"Do dormies always have breaky together?"

"Usually! It was my idea! Pretty fun, right?" Kiyotaka would've mentioned how surprised he was that people actually went along with it when he first proposed the plan, but it was important to be confident in oneself and engage with one's own achievements positively!

"'Course," Mondo ruffled Kiyotaka's hair. It seemed like he was going to play with it, but his hand shot back down to where it originally was resting on Kiyotaka's shoulder. Hm. If he was acting like this, maybe Chihiro wouldn't be the right person to ask after all; though, the potential explanations for this behavior were innumerable— Gah! How did anybody figure this stuff out on their own!?

Speaking of Chihiro, they kept on glancing at Mondo, mostly staying out of the conversation on the walk there. Were they looking for a chance to speak with him alone? How rude of him! Though he himself wouldn't think twice about it, it would likely be considered awkward to apologize with Kiyotaka present, considering he'd already done it! And he was _just_ mentally chiding Mondo for not considering other people's world view, too. For shame!

"Oh! I just remembered, I left something in my room. Stay here, I'll only be a moment." He easily escaped Mondo's grasp and speed-walked away before either could object. 

Maybe while he was over by the dorms, he could write a note to Asahina saying he needed to speak with her after next Tuesday's GSA meeting. 

-◇⬗◆⬖◇-

Kiyotaka Ishimaru was a _weird fuckin' guy._ Good thing, too; he needed to be if he was ever gonna be able to tolerate havin' a weirdo like _Mondo Oowada_ around.

Didn't make him any easier to understand, though. There's no chance in hell that Taka _forgot_ somethin' important enough to risk _bein' late_ to go back 'n get, even if they were only goin' to breakfast. Was he uncomfy? Maybe his stim stuff wasn't havin' any of the touchy-feely shit today… nah, that wasn't it, he woulda said somethin' 'bout it, he promised to. Then why…

"Hey! Earth to Mondo!" Chihiro waved a hand in front of his face causing him to snap out of his thoughts.

"Huh?"

They giggled. "Wow, you've _really_ got it bad..."

"Got what bad?" 

Chihiro looked at him and crossed their arms. "You think _that's_ going to work on me?"

"Chi, I, and I mean it when I say this, don't gotta single fuckin' clue as to what you're talkin' 'bout."

They looked at him in the way that people sometimes look at him. "You and Taka, geez!"

"The fuck's bad about me 'n Taka?!" Damn, he knew people didn't _love_ the guy, but he never thought _Chihiro_ of all people would be so judgemental about them hangin' out! And there go the bees. "The hell, Fujisaki? He's actually a pretty cool dude once you get to kno—"

"W-Wait! You've got it all wrong! I didn't mean it like that, I think it's a good thing!"

"Oh…" Mondo deflated a little, realizin' that if he kept on this road he'd prolly end up yellin' at them again, which'd make 'em cry, which he wouldn't be able to deal with. He'd have to ignore the bees. For now. "Then what did you mean?" 

They smiled at him. "I meant it like, you've got it bad _for_ Taka; like, in the crush way. Well, er, I guess that's not quite right, actually, I mean, can you call somebody you're already dating your crush? Maybe the boyfriend way would be more accurate—"

"The fuck you just say to me?!" Mondo got dangerously close to yelling again. He hushed himself hurriedly while looking to see if anyone was around. "We're not _fuckin' dating,_ okay? Don't know if you noticed, but, uh, Taka's a _dude._ And he's my _bro._ I.e. _not a chick."_

"Is _that_ what you're worried about? Mondo, do you really think that _I_ of all people am gonna judge you for being LGB—"

"I'm not a _fuckin' queer,_ Chi! I'm not like _that_ so it doesn't matter either way what you would or wouldn't do if I was."

"Oh. I get it." Uh oh. Uh oh. Damn. Fuck. Shit. They were crying. He felt panic rising up in his throat. Why were they crying? He was confident he wasn't yelling, so why… "Right. Wouldn't want to be mistaken for one of us ' _fuckin' queers,'_ would you?"

 _FUCK._ "Wait, Chi, that's not what I—"

"I know. It's not what you meant, I'm sorry… i-it just… it stung, you know?" Shit, why was he such a dumbass? Such an _asshole? Damn these fuckin' bees, man!_ No wonder this kid thought he'd beat on a sped, given the shit that came outta his mouth on the regular. God. Hell. He needed to do something, he needed to— "Y-you do things I don't understand a lot of the time, Mondo. A-and I'm sorry that I take them the wrong way and end up upsetting you. I-I've been a pretty terrible friend over the past couple of days…"

No. Hell no. "Oi! Don't go blamin' yourself when I'm the dumbass here! You're the one who's been havin' the logical reaction to shit, it's my fault if I can't take it." 

They laughed a little. "You're not a dumbass… you really should stop calling yourself one…" They wiped their eyes with their hands.

"Maybe I will once I stop actin' stupid 'bout everything. 

"I… I told him, by the way. Taka. About my, uhm, situation, I mean."

Mondo's face lit up. "Really? Fuck yeah, that's great!"

"It was surprisingly painless. He took it really well! It was basically a slip of the tongue, I'm just— I'm really happy we're friends, Mondo. A month ago, I'd've never been able to do that and I almost lost a friendship like yours—" They were crying again.

"C'mere, you!" He gave them a big bear hug, which made them laugh, followed by a surprise noogie, which made them scream. "S'what ya get for bein' sappy, ya piece of shit!" 

"Mondo! No horseplay in the halls!" He stopped immediately at the command, smiling too wide at the voice to mentally acknowledge Chihiro smirking while he turned around.

"Bro! Did you get what you needed?" He was by his side before Taka even got all the way back to where they'd been waiting for him. _Don't let what Chi said get to you. Don't let it get to you._ He didn't go in for a hug this time. 'Cause Taka might be havin' stim problems. _Obviously_. 

"Yes! I apologize for holding you two up! I remembered I had something for Asahina, and I figured it would be more convenient for her if I gave it to her now as opposed to later."

Yeah. Yeah! That made a lot of sense; it was prolly, like, help with homework or whatever, so it was for sure a time sensitive deal. No kiddin'. Taka was doin' fine! He was bein' his considerate self… so, he didn't have to worry about fuckin' up his stim anymore… which meant…

Well, he'd prolly appreciate the personal space anyhow, wouldn't he? And, 'sides, they were in the dinin' hall with everyone now, Taka'd prolly feel all awkward 'bout people starin' at them and shit… not that they'd have any reason to, 'cause it was _totally normal_ to act like this with a friend. _Chi's fuckin' wrong. Don't let it get to you._

"Isn't that right, bro?" Taka wrapped an arm around his shoulder and smiled at Makoto, and oh shit real life had been happening during that whole inner monologue, ah fuck Makoto's here, goddamnit he'd been talkin' to them.

"Hell yeah!" Mondo followed Taka's lead, giving him a fist bump with his free hand while he slumped his arm around Taka's back.

"Just because you don't understand our manly bond doesn't make it strange!" Taka declared proudly, "I can only hope that one day you'll find a connection as deep as ours, Makoto!" 

Yeah. _Yeah! Yeah, yeah, yeah!_ Fuckin' _say it_ , brother! Hell _fuckin'_ yeah! Chihiro didn't have to get it, none of these other fuckers in the damn room had to get it, Mondo didn't even have to fuckin' get it! 'Cause Taka fuckin' _got it,_ and that's what _goddamn mattered._ Hot damn. Taka's vigor was infectious as fuck, man! He felt like he could take on the whole damn world with him in his corner. With him by his side. Him in his arms. _Him_ in _his_ arms. Words of affirmation whispered into his ear. Into his mouth. Into his heart. 

_He won't let it get to you._

He'd make him… 

_...strong._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello hello hello! I hope you enjoyed this chapter! We're in the fluff zone now (nice!) but also a bit of the angst zone (not nice!) Thank you so much for reading, and especially thank you to the people who've left comments! I never know how to respond, I always get so nervous about it, but just know that I do read them and appreciate them! It really makes my day. Alright, well, until next time lovelies! I hope to see you soon and I hope you have a simply wonderful Valentine's day!


	4. Twin Skeletons

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tw for depiction of a panic attack and mentions of past sexual harassment

Kiyotaka Ishimaru was one of six regular members of the GSA. He was very excited, as that made him a shoe-in for a position on the board next year!

Of the other members, Asahina was the only one from his class. Three of the students were from class 2-B: Koizumi (secretary), Mitarai (treasurer), and Nanami (vice president). The remaining student, Gekkogahara (president), was from class 3-A; he really admired her. And Nanami. They were both their classes' representative as well, so the three of them frequently traded techniques for getting people more involved. And they were autistic, too! 

Kiyotaka had been devising something of a theory as of late, that Hope's Peak had an above average amount of autistic students enrolled. It made a lot of sense, given that a special interest could easily provide one with the drive and dedication required to achieve ultimate status and that people often worked harder at things if they had something to prove. Gekkogahara, for example, had once explained that her difficulty to understand people was the very thing that made her pursue becoming a therapist; she wanted to prove to herself she _could_ do it, and in the process fell in love with learning about the human mind. It was incredibly refreshing to hear— he was going through something similar with his own special interest and career path, what with how politics and ethics were both fields that relied _heavily_ on social factors. Though they hadn't had any official sessions yet, the idea of having a therapist available that _actually understood_ what he was going through was… nice, but strange. Nanami was similarly pleasant to talk to, although unfortunately she was a bit more difficult to approach given that her usual stims did not cooperate well with his sensory overload (he had never been a fan of clicking noises and he couldn't process what she was saying while her game's music was going.) However, he supposed that was the natural side effect of what made Nanami such a fun person to converse with in the first place; she was so _different_ from him in how her autism presented itself! She wasn't diagnosed until recently, she hadn't struggled to make friends or prove her talent in gaming to people— not because those things were easy, but because she hadn't realized they were things people were supposed to be concerned about. She didn't really care what people thought about her at all! Ever since she found out that she was apparently _supposed_ to be self conscious about how other people saw her this whole time, she'd developed a bit of a confidence issue, which was wildly outside of Kiyotaka's own experience— his autism tended to make him more confident than what was warranted. He wished he could lend some of it out to her sometimes; she was incredibly bright, he hated seeing her undermine her great ideas with uncertainty.

"Well, you could probably make that work if you braid each side separately a little bit at a time, then connect them in the middle to make a loop every so often… I think…"

"Ah! A wonderful approach! That's very helpful, thank you!" He smiled. What was it Mondo always did, give a thumbs up? Mondo made motions with his hands whenever he wanted to be sure he was communicating effectively, it was rather smart, in Kiyotaka's opinion. Whenever he wanted someone to quiet down, he would bring his hand up next to his face and lower it; whenever he wanted 'no pickles' on something, he would cross his hands into an x shape; and whenever he wanted to show people they were doing good, he'd give them a thumbs up. Kiyotaka gave Nanami a thumbs up. She wasn't one to communicate how she was feeling through facial expression, but his probably unjustified confidence was telling him she felt better after the words of encouragement.

Today they were making pride flag friendship bracelets. While it was difficult to incorporate into his own garb in a way that wasn't distracting, Kiyotaka had always had an affinity for rainbows. He considered himself very lucky in that the rainbow represented pride in both his sexuality _and_ his neurodiversity— that way little, unobtrusive things such as this friendship bracelet could effectively cover all his bases! And using Nanami's braid-then-loop technique, it was starting to look like the infinity sign! He'd have to try again some time to figure out how to do the gradation properly, but it wasn't too shabby when it was all said and done! He placed it on his wrist, under his watch, so that it was hidden by the sleeve where it wouldn't be a distraction for him to stim with. 

"Hey! Ishi! You said you wanted to chat?" Asahina caught him on their way out of the meeting room.

"Yes! I…" oh. Right. He knew he forgot something. He hadn't scripted this. "Uh, I… I… wanted to ask you something!" 

She sighed. "Sorry, Ishimaru, you seem like a really cool guy and all, but… I'm a lesbian, so…"

Kiyotaka knew this. "I knew this?"

"Huh? Then why would you… oh my God, wait. URGH! Oh, of course, don't tell me, lemme guess, you think I can overcome it with effort, right? That the right person can lead me and the rest of gaykind on the 'moral path' and cure us of—"

"Asahina, what on _Earth_ are you talking about?"

"Well, I mean, why else would you ask me out if you knew I was gay? Unless you're a chaser, which isn't the kinda guy I pegged you as at all—"

Kiyotaka's mind was thoroughly boggled. "Ask you out?! Asahina, I'm gay too!"

"WHAT?!" She roared before covering her mouth. "What?!" She squeaked.

"We _just_ came from GSA!"

"I thought you were the S!! Somebody's gotta be the S, right?! Nobody _else_ is the S!"

"Historically the reasoning behind including 'straight people' in the gay straight alliance has been to include closeted people who can attend under the guise of allies, so no, nobody _has_ to be the 'S,' so to speak."

"Oh, cool! Oh my God, I'm so relieved. You really _are_ a cool guy!" She didn't need to sound so surprised! "What did you need to ask?"

"Er… well, I mean, I guess, it's sort of relevant, to this conversation, uhm… I'm having… boy trouble?" Was that a thing people said? He felt like he was half remembering a phrase people said.

"Boy trouble?!" Hina shouted exuberantly. Talking to someone so emotive was a nice change in pace. "EEEE!! That's so exciting!! Look at you! All grown up," she made a motion similar to wiping a tear from her eye. Her sudden familiar attitude was startling, was this how everybody made friends? In the last couple of weeks, he'd had multiple people who started acting like they'd known him for years after one conversation. It wasn't unwelcome, but he couldn't shake the feeling like he was somehow doing something wrong. "So what kind of boy trouble is it! You have a crush on someone? Someone have a crush on _you?"_ She waggled her eyebrows and bounced in place.

"I don't know, that's the problem! Well, I know about me, obviously. But, him… I can't tell if he's flirting with me or if it's just his personality. I have a hard time trying to navigate other people's mentalities, even though I'm working very hard to improve at it!"

"Heck yeah!! I'm gonna help you out! I swear on it!!" Her look of starry-eyed determination was reminiscent of Chihiro's. Come to think of it, so were her words. He _really_ wanted to know why his conversations kept on eliciting this response. "What does he do that you think could be flirting?"

"Well, he's very affectionate, and a lot of the things he says sound like double entendres— but, from what I can tell, it seems like he's a little bit like that with all of his friends, only moreso with me. He doesn't do it as much in public, too, and I'm not sure if it's out of respect for the rules regarding PDA, embarrassment, a desire for the interactions to remain intimate, or quite simply no reason whatsoever. My biggest problem, though, is that I can't even ask him about it, because I don't really know how he feels about gay people and as much as I'm definitely not in the closet or ashamed of my identity, I don't think I could handle him seeing me as a threat."

"I totally get that! It's like, you know that if they don't accept you they probably weren't a good friend anyway, but that doesn't make it suck less even if you're trying to be open about it." Exactly! "Well, maybe there's a way you could gauge his thoughts with a subtle approach. Oh!" She pounded a fist on top of an upward facing palm and looked up like she was seeing the idea that had just popped into her head. "You made a bracelet today right? Maybe you could leave it out somewhere in front of him and be like, 'oops! Forgot that was there! Had to make it in a club the other day!' and then he'd be like 'looks cool' or 'haha, gay' and then you'd know which way he lands without it being about you specifically. Then you'd know if you at least had a shot, right?" 

"Hm… yes, I suppose that could work! Thank you very much, Asahina, that's a great idea!" He gave the thumbs up. It felt rather odd to do this every time, but if it helped with clarity then he could get used to it. 

She laughed. "Not a problem, but call me Hina! And make sure you give me updates on how it goes, okay? I'm super invested!! Have a great day!"

"Yes, I will! And you have one, as well!" 

-◇⬗◆⬖◇-

Mondo Oowada was one of six people who always worked out in the weight room after school on Wednesday. They hardly ever talked to each other, 'cause all of 'em usually worked out with someone else.

Mondo was alone because Chihiro had nerd club on Wednesday. He coulda asked Taka, but the guy always had shit to do right after school, so he didn't bother. Only one of 'em was in his class, and frankly, Kirigiri scared the everloving _shit_ outta him, so, yeah, not talkin' to nobody today. She was usually with Makoto, but he was mostly just there as a spotter. Mondo guessed he was in prolly about twenty million clubs and did twice as many favors for everybody, so it wasn't too surprising on days where she showed up alone. 

Mosta the other people were in class two, he was pretty sure. All of them were similarly unapproachable. Nevermind was a _literal goddamn princess,_ and while she didn't have her guard dogs with her on Wednesday, that didn't make her easier to talk to. 'Specially 'cause of her… _unique_ interests. Kuzuryuu made Mondo's criminal record look like pussy shit, and he was pretty sure Pekoyama had spidey senses for people tryin' to approach him no matter how far away she was. Komaeda, who was a walking safety violation, wasn't even there to work out, just watch like a _creep_ 'cause Nanami or what's his face weren't there to stop it and Kuzuryuu's threats didn't scare him enough to make him fuck off. Then there was _Sakakura,_ who always hogged the punching bag after his shift ended, usually with a coupla other staff members (he was pretty sure they were teachers?) keepin' him company, 'cept on Wednesdays. Wasn't too hard to figure out why _he_ and _Mondo_ didn't chat often. 

"You're alone."

That voice startled him. So much for not talkin' to anyone. "Damn, don't have ta rub it in, Jesus. 'Sides, it's Wednesday. Not like you got any room to talk."

"Ishimaru isn't with you," Kirigiri ignored him. 

"Uh, duh?" 

"He's been with you all week."

"Not, like, twenty four seven! Bro's got shit to do!"

"That you do together."

"Uh—" Shit, he had been walking with Taka on his rounds, hadn't he? And Taka had been coming to do exercises with him 'n Chi, too. Oh! But, "Yesterday we didn't. He said he had a club thing to ask Hina 'bout and I had to—"

"You had to go home early, as it was Tuesday. That doesn't count, you're still on campus right now and are fulfilling no prior obligation."

"Hey! The hell! You been spyin' on me? The fuck you know th—"

"You always rush out of class on Tuesday and are gone far earlier than any other day of the week excluding Fridays. Friday through Sunday there's an increase in gang activity, so there's no mystery as to why there, but Tuesday must be because you have other obligations, otherwise you'd stay even if you didn't have something to do or somebody to talk to, as that is what you do on Wednesdays." 

"You got my whole damn schedule worked out?!"

"Of course, don't you?" 

"I mean, I guess I don't think about it much, but I do sorta have a routine goin'..." 

"I meant don't you know other people's schedules."

"Oh. Hell no."

"So it's as I suspected…"

"Can you, like, not be cryptic for two seconds?"

"I needed to talk to Ishimaru. Tell him for me."

"Tell 'im yourself! You know where he is! Taka's routine's about as predictable as the sun's, I'm sure ya got it down."

"I do not know where he is, he takes a different route every day and switches his methodology of alternation every week. This week you have also been present, changing his typical pace. Thus I cannot accurately assess where he is in his rounds without performing several complex calculations or making large jumps to conclusions without adequate evidence. And it's not like I'm infallible; after all, I thought you'd be with him today and forego your routine, and clearly that was wrong."

"Hah! No wonder Leon's had such a hard time hidin' from him! That's pretty smart! I'll have to compliment him later."

"When you'll also tell him that I need to converse with him, I'm sure." 

"You really wanna talk to him that bad, huh? You failin' a class?"

"No."

"Nobody's givin' you shit, right? 'Cause I ain't got no reservations 'bout kickin' some dickhead's ass if you gotta teach 'em a lesso—"

"No, it's not that, either, and if it was, I am more than capable enough to take care of them myself. What I need to discuss with him is none of your concern."

"What, so _you_ get to dig into my shit but _I_ don't get to dig into yours? Coulda just said it was personal and you didn't wanna talk about it, y'know." 

"I'm not 'digging into your shit.' I'm making observations that anybody could make, if they cared enough."

"Okay, so you get to care about me, but I don't get ta care 'bout you?"

"...What?"

"I'm askin' you what's up 'cause people usually talk to Taka when shit's goin' wrong. When somebody's schedule's off, you try 'n figure out why, 'cause that could mean somethin's wrong. That's how you show you give a fuck, right? So I'm givin' a fuck, too."

"You don't think it's weird."

"Oh, no, I think it's weird as Hell. But ain't nothin' wrong with bein' weird. I'm pretty weird."

"You are much better at observational analysis than I originally thought."

Mondo snorted. "Don't get your hopes up. I'm still pullin' straight D's in my classes."

"You turn in all the homework. That should be helping you."

He groaned. "Right?! And I try on it too, but I can't focus for shit, a lotta the questions don't make sense, and half the damn time I misread the ones that do. I think I might be stupid."

"Hm." She paused, thinking. "You have a learning disability."

He rolled his eyes. "Gee, thanks."

"I mean it, genuinely. Those are common issues associated with ADHD and Dyslexia, specifically. I can't say for sure if it's either of those, but I know you have at least one. It wouldn't make sense for you to be doing poorly in all of your classes for those reasons if that wasn't the case."

"Is autism a learnin' disability?"

"No." She said quickly. "Why?"

"Oh… well, this was makin' me think of somethin' Taka was tellin' me about, but I guess that's not relevant."

"Ishimaru discusses his autism with you."

"Yeah! It's pretty interestin', actually! There's a lotta shit I had no idea about, like stimming 'n special interests and stuff. It's really cool, he's really cool." And cute. And funny. And smart. And nice. And—

"I'm autistic." 

"Huh? Oh! Awesome," he gave her a thumbs up. 

"That's what I wanted to ask him about. I wanted some tips."

"Good choice, that man has more tips than God. I'll be sure to let him know." 

"Thanks." She got up and started walking to a treadmill, but she stopped and turned back to face him. "And Mondo?" 

"Yeah?" He answered, halfway through picking up a weight.

"You're an open person. Don't keep secrets from him." 

The sound of a dumbell narrowly avoiding Mondo's foot as it fell to the floor rang throughout the weight room.

She went on with her workout like it was nothin'. Like she didn't destroy Mondo's whole mind for the rest of the day. 

She knew 'bout the accident. She'd figured it out. It wouldn't be hard for her to connect some dots, would it? 'N she knew about Tuesdays, so she prolly knew 'bout Daiya's physical therapy, so she definitely knew his brother was in an accident, but that didn't mean she knew _he_ caused it… right? Right? How'd she figure out he ruined Daiya's life? _How!?_ What'd he do to tip her off? _And why'd she think he should tell Taka!?_ So he could leave before he got too attached to a _worthless_ , _stupid_ _idiot_ who ruined the life of everybody he got close to? Or maybe she was sayin' that if Mondo cared about Taka, he should get him outta this _before_ he ruined _his_ life, too. That might be a good idea, actually, but…

Taka'd be so sad. So hurt. 'Bout it all. No matter which way Mondo went about removin' himself from the equation. And call him selfish, but he couldn't knowingly make Taka feel like that. _Not now._ As surprisingly chill as Kirigiri'd been, this wasn't a plan he could handle. _Not ever._ Even if he wanted to, he can't get through a conversation about the accident without seein' it, he couldn't think about it without seein' it, he was seein' it right now and he wanted to stop. He wanted to stop. He wanted it to stop. He didn't wanna see blood on the pavement anymore. 

He left the weight room on autopilot, didn't get a single rep in.

He landed in his bed. He dreamed about what used to be a motorcycle, then about Taka's voice, then a sixteen wheel truck, and Taka's arms, then a pink stained white jacket, and Taka's face next to his. 

-◇⬗◆⬖◇-

Mondo Oowada was not okay.

Why was anyone's guess. Mondo hadn't responded to his attempts at getting his attention in the hall, and now that they were alone in his room, he wasn't providing much more than head shakes or nods. Currently, Kiyotaka was laid next to him in the bed, hugging his back (as per the faint request of, "Hug?") Mondo himself had clutched a pillow to his chest; otherwise, his movement was limited, not even turning to face Taka as he wrapped his arms around him. He wouldn't be surprised if the boy was hardly blinking. Kiyotaka didn't have enough context. He wasn't going to be of much help in this situat— no, stop. They weren't going to get anywhere if he kept on focusing on the negatives: Mondo's ability to move and communicate at all, no matter _how_ limited, was reassuring. That ruled out many of the severe, probably-need-a-doctor things. His breathing seemed fine, too, which was good but confusing. His original guess was a panic attack of some kind, maybe even a meltdown, but he wasn't hyperventilating, he wasn't crying, he wasn't making any noises— which was very abnormal for Mondo, whose primary response to stress was 'be loud.' Kiyotaka continued his assessment of vitals, sliding his hand in-between Mondo's chest and the pillow to find his heart. Its beat was slightly fast, but not to the point of major concern. 

He felt Mondo's calloused palm weighing against the back of his hand to trap it in place. It was clammy. Mondo's chest buzzed, like he was trying to say something, like someone had shaken a box with a beehive in it, so many thoughts wanting to escape in a violent fury but unable to find an exit. 

Kiyotaka braced himself for getting stung and made an attempt at opening the lid. "May you please turn towards me?"

Mondo shook his head. No dice. Perhaps a box cutter would do the trick?

"Please? I'm really worried, I'd like to be able to see you better."

Mondo considered, then complied. Kiyotaka didn't get to see much of him for long, however; as soon as his eyes landed on him, Mondo wrapped him in a bear hug that threw Kiyotaka's face right into his pectorals. He had a feeling he wasn't going to escape this trap so easily as the last one. 

Though, this was a marked improvement, and it _was_ helpful to his cause of assessment. This could be stimming, which would explain the specific need to have Kiyotaka pressed up against his back beforehand while Mondo's arms were occupied with the pillow. If stimming made him feel good enough to move again, then this being a meltdown or something similar was a fair assumption, and it explained the lack of talking and eye contact. _And_ it would be something that Kiyotaka had first hand experience with, which meant he knew how to help! He could teach Mondo some of his coping techniques, and—

"..Shouldn't be hangin' with me," He mumbled. 

Phooey! Guess that wasn't it. A panic attack, then? Okay, new approach. How about reassurance. "I want to. I want to be with you." 

Mondo's grip on him tightened. Kiyotaka mirrored the action. Okay, he was pretty sure he understood what happened now. It might be difficult to imagine such a brash, ostentatious boy being so self conscious, but Kiyotaka knew that to be the case. Any number of poorly worded comments could set him off-kilter— this one must've cut him _really_ deep. Though Kiyotaka thoroughly believed in the power of communication, words alone wouldn't be enough here. He once again found himself wishing he could loan out his excess confidence to others...

...Maybe he _could._

...It's a crazy idea.

...But, actions do speak louder than words, don't they?

...And, they've kind of done it before.

Gently, he kissed the base of Mondo's neck. 

Ungently, his face was slammed into the base of Mondo's neck. 

"Ow!" Kiyotaka went to cover his nose with his hands before remembering there was a six foot two biker in the way.

"Shit!" Mondo quickly cupped Kiyotaka's face, examining the damage. He held Kiyotaka like he was something precious, looked at him like he was something beautiful. 

It was bizarre. Brilliantly, brilliantly bizarre. 

Mondo frowned, then groaned "This s'what I was fuckin' talkin' 'bout…"

"You were talking about… accidentally bumping my nose?" 

"No. Yeah. Kinda. Fuck. I ruin... shit, everything, I ruin everything." 

"Let it be known that I whole-heartedly disagree, but please continue explaining so I can come up with more specific and convincing arguments against this hypothesis." 

Mondo snorted, but caught himself and poorly forced his smile back down. "...Damn you!" He laughed, leaning his forehead against Kiyotaka's. 

Kiyotaka pouted. "I mean it!!"

"I know ya do. S'why I…" He stopped and tensed.

Kiyotaka kissed Mondo's cheek.

"H-hey! What're you doin'?!" Mondo shouted, flustered. 

"My mother used to tell me that kisses help heal wounds. I don't know what's hurting, but I want to make it better." 

He stared at him. "Your mom?" Not the question he thought Mondo would ask, but he'd take it! 

"Yes! Though I'm not sure it's medically sound, it did always make me feel better, so I think there has to be some merit behind it! Though she was a lawyer, not a doctor, thus it could be an alternate interpretation of the word 'heal.' She was crafty like that!" 

"Pft. You're my bro, not my mom, dude. Bros don't do that shit for each other." 

"Oh." Kiyotaka blushed in embarrassment. Well, that was an emotional punch to the gut. Answered that question, though, didn't it? Mondo wasn't interested in him like that, clearly! At least he could move on, it was probably better th—

"A-at least... most bros don't." Mondo leaned down and kissed Kiyotaka on the nose. "We can, though." 

The blush remained, but for entirely different reasons. The lighting in the room was poor, but he thought he saw it on Mondo, too. He definitely seemed to be in higher spirits; mother may have been onto something! Kiyotaka smiled at him once the surprise wore off. "It works!"

Mondo laughed and went back to hugging him, looser this time, tucking his head into Kiyotaka's trapezius (that seemed to be his favorite spot.) Eventually, he heard snoring. Sleep, sleep sounded like a good idea. How long had it been since Kiyotaka had taken a nap? Years. A decade…

_Ding-Dong._

Gosh diddly darn it!

It took him a minute, but he managed to escape from Mondo's limp bind. 

"Ah! Ms. Kirigiri! Hello!" Uh-oh, he should probably be whispering. "I'm terribly sorry, but Mondo's—"

"Asleep. Good. And you're here, that's better. I need to speak with you." 

Oh! That made some sense! She must've tried his door before coming here. This _was_ the next best guess as to where he'd be this time of day. "Alright! Hold on," he stepped into the hall and gently shut the door behind him. "What do you need?" 

"Oowada's okay."

Ah, she'd seen him. "He is, yes! Your concern is appreciated. I'm sure he'll be glad to hear you cared enough to ask!" 

She studied him briefly. "You have autism."

"Correct."

"As do I."

"Wonderful! I sort of figured, you're a lot easier to understand than most people."

"...I have never gotten that from a single person in my entire life."

"Yes, that's certainly relatable. I think we're very similar!" 

"We're not. That's my problem."

"Is it?"

"It… is. You're incredibly emotive, and approachable, and people seem to like you. People don't feel that way about me, I'm neither of those things. I can't tell if it's because I was raised this way or if it's my disorder." 

Well, it was true that Kirigiri's way of speaking was rather objective, and she wasn't much for facial expressions, but, "Your issue is that you're basing your progress on strangers; you say people like me, but most don't, and while I _can_ be expressive, I've been told that I have 'resting itch-bay' face. Instead, focus on the ones who already like you, and focus on yourself! If you want to be more sociable, start by making goals at that level."

"Easier said than done."

Kiyotaka smiled. "True; but! Things that are easy are hardly worth doing! Let's see if I have any tips that could help… well, something to keep in mind is that often, problems come from misunderstandings rather than active malice. The way we talk differs from how most people approach conversation. This is why I said we're similar: we're both straightforward in our speech, but never quite sure of where to stop talking. For me, as you've probably noticed, that leads to talking a bit too much. For you it means a tendency towards brevity, to the point where a lot of inferences have to be made in order to grasp your meaning." 

"So… I have to talk more."

"No! Not at all! Well, not not at _all,_ technically this suggestion _is_ to talk more, but only a little bit! Essentially, make sure people know how you operate! Say something like, 'I have trouble conveying my emotions and thoughts, but I do care about what you're saying right now.' Obviously, you don't have to say that verbatim— try coming up with a few scripts to have on hand, actually! I can help if you would like, though I'm not sure I'm the best at making things sound 'natural.'"

"No, that's fine, I'll ask Makoto."

"Good call! Another exercise when communicating is adapting to specific people. Empathy, as a practice, is a skill that has to be learned and constantly re-enforced, even for neurotypicals. For us, it can be a bit harder to pin down— we think of what _one_ _likely_ feels given the facts at hand, but applying that based on how somebody _in particular_ reacts to things is where it gets tricky. It's sort of akin to an argumentative paper versus a shouting match. We approach empathy by raising evidence in order to deduce a conclusion, but emotions are more like a spontaneous fight. Therefore, we have to understand people's worldview and emotions without prior justifications; instead of matching the evidence to the person and creating a conclusion, we match the person and the conclusion to potential evidence."

"I see, so I have to reverse my process." 

"Precisely!"

"Ishimaru, I have a question."

"Shoot."

"Will you be my friend?"

"Of course!" He beamed. What excellent luck! In the course of less than a month, he had already made so many friends!

Wow. Less than a month. He checked his watch. He hadn't even been off duty for a full hour.

Time moved so differently when Mondo was around.

"You should get back to him. I said something that upset him earlier."

"I probably should. And, don't take it too personally! Don't tell him I told you this, but he's a lot more sensitive than he looks." 

"Yes... that's certainly relatable."

"He's pretty similar to us, too, underneath that rough exterior. Good afternoon."

"Goodbye, Kiyotaka." 

He slid back into the room as quietly as possible, thanking God that he could finally get out of those fluorescent lights. The dorm was shifting from dim to dark, and Mondo was still splayed out where he was before on the bed, using a pillow as a placeholder for Kiyotaka. Oddly enough, he wasn't snoring.

He removed his jacket and sat on the bed. Mondo immediately chucked the pillow back to its spot and latched onto Kiyotaka, dragging him down next to him.

"Missed ya," he said against his neck. He squirmed a little, that always felt so nice. 

"I missed you too. Kirigiri's glad you're oka..ay." Mondo was kissing his neck. Mondo was definitely kissing his neck. Mondo was _definitely_ kissing his neck. A lot. His earlier squirming looked like nothing compared to what he was doing now. 

"Sorry. You seemed stressed. And tired." 

Sleep. That's right. He wanted sleep. 

"Kisses make things better, don't they? Take it easy and relax. Let me take care of ya. Bros help each other out." 

Sleep sounded like a good idea. How long had it been since the last time he took a nap? Time worked so different with Mondo around. 

He fell asleep to Mondo's gentle kisses. 

-◇⬗◆⬖◇-

Mondo Oowada was _not okay._

He loved this guy. He honest to God loved this guy. And he almost said so out loud! Frequently! Every day since his freakout last month! 

How'd this happen? What's it mean? 

_Don't let it get to you._

People loved their friends. It's fine. Chicks said that sentimental shit all the time— Hina, she was always sayin' that to Oogami! And if he was makin' Chi real concerned, sometimes they'd say it to him, too! _It's! fine!_ It's a close friend thing!

…And he and Taka, they were real close. Figuratively and literally. Actively. _Daily._ Mondo could hardly pry himself offa the dude. He still had to go home most nights, couldn't leave Daiya 'n Michi hangin', but it was gettin' a _lot_ harder to leave campus. 'Specially since, "You're so warm." 

Taka hummed, pressing his lips to Mondo's forehead. He wished it was his mouth.

No he didn't.

But friends can do _that_ , too, can't they?

What _could_ friends do. What're the rules? Why won't anybody ever tell him the _goddamn rules?_ As far as he could tell, there ain't an upward limit on it. Hell, he'd seen dudes in the locker room call each other babe before slapping asses and comparin' dicks, what's a kiss? 

...Intimate. That's what it was. Mondo'd never kissed anybody before, not on the lips. Not nowhere else 'til Taka entered the picture, either. It'd prolly feel better if his first was with a friend, someone he _actually_ gave two shits about and not, like, some rando chick. With Taka, he wouldn't get all nervous. He wouldn't feel any pressure, wouldn't worry 'bout fuckin' up 'n breakin' rules. 'Cause Taka always let him know when he was crossin' lines and what exactly, in detail, those lines were and why those lines were out there in the first place. 

He loved this guy. He wanted to make him feel... special. He wanted to kiss on him 'n squeeze him hard 'n call him every pet name under the goddamn sun. He wanted to listen to him talk about the things he found important and listen to him repeat words over an' over and listen to him hum and tap and smack and flap and listen to him silently, sleepily breathe next to his ear and. Hell, he really _loved_ this guy. Nah, he wouldn't mind at all if Taka's his first kiss. It'd be sorta fun. Somethin' the two of them could share, could reminisce 'n laugh about later, something that might finally drive those weird, curious thoughts outta Mondo's head. 

"Oi. Taka. You have your first kiss yet? On the lips, I mean."

"Hm? Oh, yes, I've had a few."

 _Fuck._ Mondo's stomach did somersaults. It'd be _weird_ if it was only _Mondo's_ first kiss. Taka prolly wouldn't wanna kiss _a noob_ just for the hell of it. "Forreal?" His voice cracked, morbid curiosity takin' over his vocal chords while his mind preoccupied itself with images of Taka mackin' on faceless nerd girls, "What were they like?" 

He shifted awkwardly. "They... weren't really ideal. In grade school, my classmates would dare girls to kiss me, as a rumor had spread that my 'disease' was contagious." 

Mondo immediately snapped out of his wallowing and sat up. "The fuck!? That's such bullshit! That's—" He was pissed. He slammed a fist into the bedframe. They did that? To _his fuckin' bro?_ The _sweetest sweetheart_ to ever walk the fuckin' planet?

Taka grabbed his hand and squeezed it. "Hey, calm down, it's not _that_ big of a deal—"

"The hell it ain't! They— that's—" he took a deep breath and squeezed Taka's hand back, rubbing his thumb across his knuckles. "Kiyotaka, they took a milestone away from you for the express purpose of shithead douchebaggery. Not to mention they were _sexually harassin' you._ That's a _huge fuckin' deal_."

"That is true, but… they were only kids! It was hardly the worst thing that they could've done."

"Jesus fuckin…" Mondo sighed. This… talkin' about it thing's not gonna work, was it? Not right here and now, not without a debate planned. Taka was too damn bullheaded to be convinced otherwise. But, he couldn't leave this hangin'! He wasn't gonna let these assholes get away with ruining Taka's chances at happiness! "Hey, Taka, I'll tell you what," he raised a hand to cup his face. "You deserve to have kisses be somethin' special. And, they can heal stuff, right? Like your ma said, they make shit better. I'm gonna make sure you only got good memories of kisses from now on. I promise." 

"O-okay." Taka's auburn eyes were awestruck, too awesome and too awful to look at. Mondo shut his eyes tight and leaned forward, givin' him a (probably pretty terrible) kiss on the lips. 

He kissed him back. _He kissed him back!!!_ Hell! Yeah! Mondo's confidence went through the roof. Smilin' into the kiss, he squeezed Taka's hand again outta joy. 

Finally, he broke away, "Well, whaddya say, that better tha—" Taka holstered him with his thighs and flipped them around ( _God_ he's strong), pinning Mondo and giving him another kiss on the lips. 

"Significantly," he whispered between soft pecks. 

It'd've been nice to have kept going like that for the rest of the day, but they both had shit to do, so the (heavily negotiated) half hour they had left would have to work. 

Kissin', Mondo determined in that amount of time, was dope as hell; kissing Kiyotaka, in particular, freakin' _ruled._ Not too surprisin', considering the guy was so naturally passionate, but _damn._ Even after the initial adrenaline wore off and they'd become a lil lazier, he dripped with enthusiasm. Mondo's goal was to make Taka feel special, but here _Taka_ was makin' _him_ feel like the luckiest goddamn man in the world (an achievement, given that he personally knew both _Makoto fuckin' Naegi_ and _Nagito fuckin' Komaeda.)_

...'Cause he had such a great friend.

_Obvi._

'N that's why Mondo was so adamant 'bout kissin' him, too. 'Cause Taka's a great friend, his best friend, and it was only natural to wanna make your best friend feel like he was _the best._

_Don't let it get to you._

"Mondo, homework." 

"Awww, c'moonn."

"We had an agreement."

"Alright, alright, homework it is. Then I prolly gotta jet."

"Who knows, if you do well you might get a little reward before you leave," Taka smiled, patted his cheek, and got offa him.

Mondo liked the sound of that. He followed him over to the coffee table. 

"Hey, sweetheart, what's this?" He picked up a yarn… thingy that'd been layin' there.

"Oh! It's a friendship bracelet! We made them last month in GSA!"

Mondo had no fuckin' clue what that was, but Taka was so excited about it that there was no chance in hell he was gonna ask. It was prolly, like, General Student Assembly, or somethin' serious sounding like that. He looked it over. Hey! This was the thing! The autism thing. He saw it online. Maybe it was an autism club? "Cool," he gave a thumbs up. 

"You think so?" Taka's face lit up.

"Yeah! It's great that you're hangin' out with people who getcha, y'know? I don't really know a lot about alla that stuff." 

"You… don't?" Right, Taka thought he might be autistic, too, didn't he? But… no, that couldn't be right, he woulda noticed before _this year_ that somethin' was up. This shit's diagnosed in people when they're babies or whatever, he's basically an adult now. And didn't it make people, like, major shut-ins? He was super not that. He could see himself _maybe_ bein' ADHD, but _autistic?_ Nah. 

"I… don't." It felt weird to say, though. Taka could clearly tell he hesitated. 

"It's okay, you know. If you don't know yet. I'm sure you've got a lot to think about." 

_Ugh!_ Taka fuckin' _got_ him, dude! It's like he could read his goddamn mind! "Thanks, man. I needed to hear that."

Taka's smile mellowed out into somethin' soft and fond, before steeling himself into a look of determination. "Okay! Math time!"

The two of them got a bit carried away with Mondo's 'reward' for finishing his homework with all correct answers (bless God for Kiyotaka Ishimaru's ability to explain things in a way that made some goddamn sense.) It ended up takin' longer than they'd anticipated, which was why Mondo was frantically driving down a dark road to make it back home before Daiya had a cow. He didn't like Mondo ridin' past dark without other people they knew around, not since the not a good thing to think about while driving stop thinkin' 'bout that while driving. He was almost to his house, anyway. Daiya prolly didn't even notice he was gone.

"The fuck've you been, asshole?!" 

"Sup." 

"'Sup!' 'Sup,' he says to me! We've got ourselves a real joker on our hands tonight! A gen-u-ine. Stand-up. Com-e-di-an." 

"Sorry, bro, I sorta lost track of time…"

"Lost track of—" Daiya paused and looked him over, real good. He wheeled closer and squinted. "...You… you mothafuckin' scallywag! Fuck yeah, good for you!" In an instant, Mondo found himself in the treacherous grasp of a noogie. "Jesus, kid, ya nearly gave me a goddamn heart attack, next time just _tell_ me when you're gettin' some. So, is she hot?"

Mondo's face went red as he realized what exactly Daiya'd been looking at, instinctively coverin' the bruise on his neck. Yeah, they'd _definitely_ gotten carried away. Daiya laughed at him as he let go. 

"C'mon, man! Gimme the deets!" 

"Well, uh, sHE'S…" Shit, Mondo needed to watch his volume, Daiya was totally gonna know he was lyin'! Picking some words that actually described Kiyotaka might help. "Real... nice… and smart… and strong… and..." uh, uh, "b-beautiful."

"Damn, you got it _bad,_ bro."

"What the hell, Chi said that too!"

"Aha! So it _ain't_ Chihiro, which means I _haven't_ met her!" _Fuck!_ That would've been his best scapegoat! "Dude, you gotta tell me her name like, pronto ándale. I'm dyin' o' curiosity over here!" 

Maybe he could make up a name that was similar? "It's Kiyo—" WAIT, "—ko. Kyoko." Mondo was a genius. Or an idiot. Or both. Maybe he was both. She was either gonna kill his ass or congratulate him on the quick thinkin'.

"That's a cute name! Bet she's a total smoke show. I'm prouda you, little man. Feels like just yesterday you were cryin' 'bout scrapin' ya knee on the playground and now look atcha, a man among men! Whaddya wanna eat, we gotta celebrate!" 

Success!

So why don't it feel like it? 

Well, prolly 'cause lyin' to Daiya always fuckin' _sucked._ But… it felt like there was more to it.

...If Daiya knew that _his_ name was Kiyo _taka,_ that Mondo's _first kiss_ and _reason for bein' late_ was a _boy,_ would he've reacted differently? Mondo wanted more than anything in that moment to think the answer was 'no,' but… there ain't any evidence for that. _Dad_ woulda been furious. Dad hated when he broke rules more than anybody else ever had.

But, well, he wasn't breakin' rules this time, right? 'Cause, they were friends. Only friends. And there wasn't an upper limit on what friends could do with each other, so Daiya wouldn't think it was that big a deal. Daiya and Dad, they weren't the same person by a longshot… 

Still wasn't gonna tell him though.

"Oi, space cadet, you want bacon on this pizza?"

"Huh? Oh, yeah." 

"What's got you so zoned out, huh? Thinkin' 'bout your girl?"

God, he did _not_ want to go down that fuckin' road again. He wracked his brain for some other thing he'd've reasonably been contemplatin'. His mind found its way back to Taka's bracelet 'n the conversation they'd had about it. ' _It's okay if you don't know.'_

Did... he _want_ to know? Or would it be better if he went through life without knowin' one way or the other? 

"Whaddya do if someone thinks you're autistic?"

"Give 'em a knuckle sandwich." 

"Not in a bad way! Like, medically, how should I go 'bout that."

Daiya's eyebrow quirked. "Don't know why ya givin' a cheap shot like that the benefit of the doubt but... I guess I wouldn't really know. Ya don't think you might be, do ya?"

"I mean, I dunno, don't I seem kinda... _weird_ to you, sometimes?" 

"Oi." Daiya looked up from the frozen pizza. "Oi oi oi oi oi oi." He slapped the table. " _Oi!_ You're fuckin' awesome, and anybody who thinks otherwise can stuff it. I'll always think so, no matter whatcha are or aren't, y'hear me? And I'm sure your lil sweetheart feels the same damn way."

Mondo gulped. "No matter what?"

Daiya smiled. "Promise. Now let's eat!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello again lovelies! I hope you enjoyed this chapter! I know I enjoyed writing it (though I suppose it's a tad on the angsty side. Sorry!) Welcome to my MondoGiri and TakaAoi friendship agenda asfjllgddhk. Thank you so much for reading AND ESPECIALLY THANK YOU to those of you who've left comments! You've all been so sweet that it genuinely brings happy tears to my eyes and I really can't thank you enough for that. Particularly all the other nd people who've shared how they could relate to the struggles I've been writing about; it's really nice, I love this community so much! Have a positively peachy week and I hope to see you again soon!


	5. Lake Effect Kid

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tw for discussion of past child abuse and casual homphobia

Kiyotaka Ishimaru was not okay.

It was just his luck that his ambiguously requited crush had confessed to him that he was ambiguously straight right before finals.

"And then immediately after we kissed, he said he was glad I had the GSA because he wouldn't be able to relate to my LGBT+ specific issues. He didn't sound very confident, though, so I prompted him for further detail, which caused him to admit that he was questioning."

"So you got a shot!" Hina bounced in her chair and flapped her hands excitedly. He had since learned that she, too, had ADHD. He should expand his autism theory to include the full span of neurodivergence, that would likely be more accurate.

"Well, maybe, but I'm a bit worried. I don't want him to feel pressured either way simply because he now knows my intentions are potentially romantic; I'd feel awful if he made a grand sweeping conclusion on something as important as his sexuality merely because of his feelings towards me. He should be allowed the time to question, it's an important part of the process!" 

"Hmm…" Hina put a hand to her face, then slammed it down on her palm. "Okay! How 'bout this: would you feel the same if you were a girl?"

"...Is this kind of situation significantly different for lesbians?" 

"No, not both of you! I mean, like, you're a girl and he's a guy. Or maybe you're a guy and he's a girl." 

"I'd definitely still be gay if I'm still a boy. I'd probably be gay if I was a girl, too, though I admit I'm not really sure how that works. I've heard many testimonials from trans people that, upon transitioning, they learn that who they once thought they were attracted to was a byproduct of what society anticipated for—" 

"In this scenario you're a cishet girl."

"Me? _Cishet?_ I can only suspend my disbelief so far, Hina!" 

She giggled, but it really was quite difficult for him to imagine. "Just try for me, alright? If you were a cishet girl in this situation, would you still be worried you were pressuring him?"

"I'd like to think the thought would cross my mind, but I doubt that, were I in that situation, I would have the life experience that would inspire me to attempt at inquiring in the first place. But, ignorance isn't an excuse for negligence."

She groaned. "What I'm saying is, straight people don't really _think_ about this kinda thing when they get into relationships. You shouldn't have to either!"

"Only when they get into relationships with people whom they believe to be straight! The reason that it's different in this instance is because, when you get into a same gender relationship, you must first _know_ whether or not that person also likes the same gender. In general, straight people assume the other is _also_ straight due to societal conditioning. If I were a straight girl, and I knew he was questioning his sexuality, I would feel a similar way! At least, I hope I would, but that's such a significantly different life from my own that I have really no idea." 

Hina made an upset face, indicating she disagreed with his conclusion. "You're overthinking it, Taka. If you feel so unsure about it, though, then fine! Don't ask him out! Let whatever happens, like, happen, you know? You'll get there eventually, I know it! Nobody said you had to take things in the fast lane, as fun as that would be." 

"Yeah… you're right! As long as we're enjoying each other's company, it doesn't matter if we're dating or not. Thank you! Finally, that's cleared up! I can go back to focusing on studying!" 

"Not right now! It's club time, Taka!" Chiaki chided from her and Gekkogahara's puzzle. He could not remember when everybody in GSA also adopted his new nickname, but he found it quite amusing that Mondo and Chihiro seemed to have started a trend.

"Of course! Haha!" He had finished his side of their puzzle long ago, but Asahina seemed less than interested in the activity. 

"Okay, new topic!" She declared before looking at a puzzle piece. Her face showed all the signs that none of the visual information about it was reaching the interpretation center of her brain. Yeah, he knew those days _all_ too well. 

"Do you want me to help on the other—"

"No!" She jerked. "I totally got it, trust me… Anyway! Uh…" she looked around, as though she was trying to physically find the next topic of conversation. "How's Mondo doing? I mean, with the tutoring?"

At first he was confused, as Mondo wasn't exactly a 'new' topic of conversation, but then he remembered that Asahina didn't know the identity of his crush. "Oh, great! It's been helping both of us out a lot," he recovered quickly, giving a thumbs up. 

"Awesome! You think you'll still hang out together after finals are done? Like, maybe you could be study buddies from the get go next semester!" 

That was… something that had never occurred to Kiyotaka. He'd always seen the tutoring as a bonus on top of hanging out, something they might as well get done if they're spending so much time together, but… people don't think the same way as each other, do they? Perhaps Mondo saw the 'hanging out' parts as the bonus, something that was nice that came extra with the tutoring, but wouldn't happen once lessons were over. Maybe Mondo didn't even see it as nice. No, he should give him the benefit of the doubt in that regard, but that left the other matter to concern himself over. Who's to say that once break was over, they'd still be so close? That Mondo hadn't seen this as a temporary arrangement all along? He couldn't read minds, after all.

"Is this seat taken?" 

"Oh, hey Sayaka! What's up?" Hina greeted.

"Ah, Maizono, hello! No, it's not, please, join us— This puzzle is a bit tricky, we could use the extra help!" 

She smiled at them and pulled out the chair. "I'm so happy I was able to make it before club time was over! My schedule is a nightmare." 

"Oh my God, yeah, I totally get that! At my old high school I dual sported _every season,_ I had a meet, like, every freakin' day!"

"That's not healthy, Hina, your body needs time to rest," Kiyotaka scolded.

"That's why the school won't let me do that here," she pouted.

"You should be thanking them. Though, I guess I do understand a little bit where you're coming from. I get so restless over breaks and holidays. I hate taking days off." 

"Taka, if that's how you feel, maybe you should ask Mondo if he wants to spend some time with you over break!" Sayaka slotted a piece into place. "His house is really close to the dorms, it wouldn't be a hassle."

"You're staying here over break?" 

"Yes, I am." How Maizono knew that was a mystery, but, "That's the plan right now, anyway."

"Wow, that sucks!" Kiyotaka must've involuntarily grimaced, because Asahina immediately covered her mouth. "Eep! I mean— no offense or anything, Taka! I guess I'd just get suuuuper lonely and really miss my family if I did that. Yuta's had, like, a whole semester to train, so I've been dying to race him!" 

"Komaru's been threatening to tackle me with hugs for the past week now," Naegi sat down across from them. Wonderful! Two new faces for the GSA in one day! 

"My grandfather has preemptively sent me some case files to look over. We're going to France," Kirigiri sat next to him. Make that three! 

"That's fun! It's been so long since I've been to France," Maizono smiled.

"Less fun when murder's involved." Kirigiri's voice remained as monotone as ever, but Kiyotaka had the feeling she was joking. It was starting to get easier to tell with her.

Maizono giggled. "That's arguable," she quipped back.

The rest of the meeting was quite delightful. He hoped that after the break, they all would make an effort to come to GSA; it's much livelier with everyone there! 

...Which was why when he got back to his dorm, he felt very… strange. Kiyotaka was incredibly energized, and he had nothing to do to put it to use. He'd completed his over-break homework weeks ago, not to mention all the homework for the next semester his teachers were willing to give him in advance. It was Tuesday, so Mondo wasn't here to talk to, and Chihiro was busy working on a pretty intense code for a final project. 

...Well... now that his mind was clear, he could focus on studying! Oh, how quickly one forgets their previous passtimes when one acquires new hobbies! He cracked open his chemistry textbook and began to review the first few chapters.

...He tried to, at least. As much as the two liked to play around and have fun together, Kiyotaka surprisingly found it much easier to stay on track for serious studying when Mondo was around. Having someone who asked questions and read with him was very useful in aiding his focus, as it turned out. Thus, Kiyotaka's attempts at studies on Tuesdays and weekends were gradually becoming more fruitless. He wondered how he used to do this, study alone _every single day—_ but, then it finally registered that the same amount of studying Kiyotaka accomplished in _one_ session with Mondo would take him _twice as long_ to get through before. Wow. He meant what he said to Asahina about it being mutually beneficial, but now that he genuinely thought about it, he hadn't even known the extent to which that was true! That extra time has been so useful! For example, now he was getting a proper amount of sleep at night (and, happily, Mondo was too!) Additionally, he had started reading books for _fun_ again, not that reading a book for school wasn't fun. He tried to get into watching TV shows or movies, as his peers had recommended to him— and he did enjoy watching them socially, but he didn't much care for it alone. Staying informed about his friends' interests, however, was something he found incredibly important, so he read the books that their favorite movies and shows were based on (if they had them, naturally.) 

...And thus, he'd ended up sifting through his pile of library books, trying to decide on a murder mystery, a young adult paranormal romance, and a motorcycle manual. As curious as Kiyotaka was about the other two (he was about halfway through both and incredibly invested in their plots), he really ought to learn more about motorcycles if he was ever going to be able to keep up with Mondo's discussion of them and the various motorcycle-themed television shows he enjoyed. He'd read this book cover to cover multiple times already, but for some reason the information never stuck. Probably because Mondo wasn't the one teaching him it. Probably because every time he read it, he thought about Mondo and got off track.

...Like right now.

...He tried again. But now, after analyzing his own friendship-based reading habits and positive change in lifestyle, he couldn't help but feel… _lonely._ He'd spent the whole day talking and spending time with people, and he wanted _more?_ Who would've thought that— Kiyotaka Ishimaru, an extrovert! He'd always thought the contrary, but frankly, he never had people he could spend time with in order to put it to the test. In retrospect, his whole life seemed very... lonely. And over break he'd be more lonely. Justifiably lonely. He'd be, literally, alone. For two weeks. Maybe it'd be better to bite the bullet and call his father, say he's decided to spend time at home instead?

...No. No, as much as he loved his father, as much as he didn't want to be alone, he couldn't do that. For a multitude of reasons. 

...But… he could still call him, right? He hadn't talked to him in awhile. Though, if he did that, he'd probably be worried that there was an emergency, which would temporarily add even more unneeded stress to his father's already stressful day. Besides, he was likely still at work, anyway. Maybe not. 

...He faffed about, attempting to do anything productive at all and failing miserably each time. Eventually, he resigned himself to sleep.

-◇⬗◆⬖◇-

Kiyotaka Ishimaru was not okay.

It was stressing him the fuck out. 

"He's never acted like this before, dude! You don't think I did somethin' wrong, do ya?"

"I mean… it doesn't really sound like you did anything out of the ordinary…" Chihiro supplied without looking up from their monitor, blissfully unaware that Mondo made out with the fuckin' guy not even a whole week ago, which was _pretty damn outta the ordinary._ Not that he was gonna bring _that_ shit up to _these_ chucklenuts, though. Well, chucklenuts and Chihiro, but he wasn't tellin' _them_ anytime soon, either, they were already acting weird _enough_ about the 'Mondo and Taka' situation.

"I still don't get why you guys, like, care," Leon groaned. "Mon, dude, didn't he give you, like, ten detentions this semester alone?" 

"Yeah, so? Ain't like I didn't earn 'em." 

"I'm just sayin', I'd have a really hard time trying to be friends with a guy like that. It's gotta feel like you're walking on eggshells all the time." 

"Yeah man, I'd have to agree. Taka's way too high energy for me," Hiro yawned. 

"First of all, fuck you both, second of all it's a damn good thing he's not _you're_ best friend, then, but he is _mine_ and _I_ happen to think he's awesome and perfect _just the way he goddamn is."_ The two men shrunk back from him, and oh shit Mondo was being kinda aggressive, wasn't he? Actually, fuck it, they deserved a bit of aggression! "And what kinda assholes diss a guy who's not even fuckin' _here_ immediately after hearin' he's been havin' a bad day, huh?"

Leon spluttered, "We were not dissing him!"

"You kinda were…" Chihiro looked up.

"C'mon, man, we were just stating the facts!" Hiro put his hands up defensively. "He _is_ really energetic, and sorta… uhm… strict." 

"It's not 'statin' facts' when you say it bitchily," Mondo crossed his arms. 

"Bitchily?!" Leon balked. "That's rich, coming from the biggest bitch on the planet!" 

"Leon!" Chihiro slapped his wrist.

"I gotta _fact_ I can _state_ for you, ever since you randomly decided you were gonna be attached at the hip to the _fucking hall monitor,_ you've been ditching us to suck his dick every possible opportunity you get. That is _bitch behavior._ He's even got you on a fucking leash!"

_"Leon!"_

"I— he— That's not— I am not sucking his dick!"

"See, even _you_ can admit that you're ditching us for him!" 

Mondo got in his face, "MAYBE I WOULDN'T DITCH YA IF YOU WEREN'T A JEALOUS ASSHOLE!" 

"ME?! JEALOUS?! OF _KIYOTAKA_ _FUCKIN' ISHIMARU?! Ha!_ Funny fuckin' joke, man! Just 'cause he's your _boyfriend_ doesn't mean we all think he's hot shit."

Mondo yanked him up by the collar of his shirt. "He's not my _fuckin' boyfriend, douchebag."_

"What're you gonna do? Punch me? Get yourself another detention and risk _embarrassing_ him so much he won't _make out_ with you anymore."

Mondo's eyes went wide. How did he know about that?

"LEON, SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!"

They both looked at Chihiro, awestruck.

He dropped Leon (who landed on his ass.)

Chihiro cleared their throat. "We all have to get going soon, anyway, so let's take some time to cool our heads and talk, _civilly,_ later. Mondo, you can't cheer up Taka if you're also in a really bad mood, so you need to go do something relaxing. And Leon, if Sayaka finds out you were late to rehearsal today because you were too busy being homophobic, she'll have your head." 

" _Homophobic?!"_ Leon gaped. "I wasn't being _homophobic!_ You can't be _homophobic_ to a _straight dude!"_

Chihiro looked at Leon. 

Leon looked at Chihiro.

Leon looked at Mondo. 

Mondo looked back at them, not sure what they were doing. 

Leon looked at Chihiro. "Don't be stupid." 

Chihiro looked at him harder in response. 

Leon looked back at Mondo. Then he got up to leave. "What fucking ever." 

"Yeah," Mondo said kinda pathetically as he stormed off to the weight room. Fine. He needed to talk to Kirigiri about the 'oops, my brother thinks we're dating' thing, anyway. 

Luckily, the punching bag was open after he got back from changing. Sakakura must've finally gotten tired of bein' alone and switched shifts.

He started takin' swings and felt the bees in his chest fly away.

"Your form sucks."

Mondo yelped. 

"You're here early," Sakakura said, stretching. "You and Kiyotaka have a falling out or something?" 

"What?! No!" The accusation alone made him wanna hurl. "How'd _you_ know me 'n Taka were friends?" 

"Friends?" Sakakura scoffed, muttering under his breath, "Christ… fuckin kids, man…" He started wrapping his knuckles. "I gotta talk to the kid a lot. Technically we're in the same department, y'know? Plus, I _do_ got eyes. Look, if you're pretendin' that's him, that's prolly not a good sign for your relationship."

"I'm not!" Mondo punctuated his words with punches, "I'm pretendin'! It's fuckin'! Kuwata!" 

"Why don't you just punch the _real_ Kuwata?"

"That the sorta thing a staff member's s'posed to tell students?"

Sakakura smirked. "He's rubbing off on you." 

"Is not!" The punching bag slammed against the wall. "...I don't wanna 'embarrass' Taka," he finally answered. 

Sakakura looked at him in disbelief. " _Kiyotaka_ said you embarrass him?" 

"Nah, Kuwata."

"Why're you listenin' to the guy you're pretendin' to punch?" 

Mondo stopped his assault. "I… don't know."

"Thought so." Sakakura threw his water bottle on the ground. "You gotta lotta power but your footwork's fuckin' terrible. Reset after every punch, actually think about what you're doin' for once in your goddamn life. Like this." Sakakura proceeded to perform the three cleanest punches Mondo'd ever seen.

"Damn!" 

"See that? All footwork and thinking. Not _dwelling,_ actual thinking. Quick, not rash." 

Mondo tried it out. He tripped a little the first couple times, but he could feel himself improving.

"Great. You'll be the baddest mother hubbard on the block in no time. Now move the fuck over, I wanna get my sets in and your creepy buddy's been glarin' at us for, like, five minutes." 

He looked over his shoulder, and sure enough, there was Kyoko. They'd agreed to spot each other on Wednesdays since nobody else was available, she was prolly waitin' on him so she could start. He walked over to her.

"'Sup." 

"Nothing much." She… smirked? It was always hard to tell with her, but he was getting better at it. She seemed like she was in a good mood. "'Sup' with you?" 

"Same here…" Couldn'ta sounded more confident on that in front of the girl who's smarter than Satan, eh Mondo? 

"That so?" She began her bench press.

Might as well get it over with. "Well," he rubbed the back of his neck and looked away from her face, before realizing oh shit that's not a good idea and getting back into spotter position. "...actually, there's somethin' I gotta tell ya." 

"Go on," she said through her reps, weirdly excited. Okay, not, like, _super_ weirdly excited, but for Kirigiri, yeah, it was weird to be able to, like, _know_ what she was feelin' at all, so... weirdly excited fit the bill. This happen to everybody who became friends with her? Huh. Still, why'd she be excited 'bout this?

"So, uh, I _might've_ PANICKED and accidentally implied to my bro thAT we're DATIN'," he said stupidly fast.

"...What?" For the first time ever, she seemed dumbstruck. She almost dropped the bar, but caught it. 

"I'm sorry! It's a long story 'n I can't really go into detail, 'n it's nOT LIKE I _WANT US_ T'BE DATIN' OR NOTHIN', THAT'D BE, LIKE, SUPER WEIRD, NO OFFENSE, YOU'RE COOL 'N ALL, BUT I DEF SEE THIS AS A FRIENDS THING—"

"We're friends?"

"Duh. BUT I TOTALLY GET IF YA DON'T WANNA BE NOMORE! OR, LIKE, IF Y'WANNA GO ON A FRIEND BREAK, OR SOMETHIN', I DUNNO, I DUNNO HOW TO DEAL WITH THIS KINDA SHIT."

"Nor do I. But, really, I don't think I'm the one you owe an apology." 

"...Huh?" 

"Mondo, you probably broke Kiyotaka's heart." 

"What?! No I— Shit!" He totally did! There's no chance in hell that _Taka_ and _Daiya,_ a match made in _worry wart hell,_ didn't talk to each other about Mondo all the goddamn time, and Daiya had definitely asked Taka for the deets on his 'new girlfriend,' Kyoko, who Mondo'd _actually_ been spendin' more time with recently, which meant that Taka would connect the dots as 'my bro doesn't trust me enough to talk 'bout his love life' and not 'Jesus Christ Almighty, Mondo's a bad liar.'

"Mondo, the bar…"

"Fuck!" He grabbed it and placed it back on the rack, maneuvering around to add more weight for his set. "Sorry 'bout that, Kiri."

"It's alright, but I'd really prefer it if you'd save your epiphanies for when _you're_ on the bench."

He laughed as he got into position. "Fair." He began his reps, feeling a lot lighter now. Prolly 'cause he knew what was gettin' Taka down, and it had a pretty simple solution, too! He'd just tell him the truth, that he wasn't datin' Kyoko and he only said that 'cause Daiya got him all freaked out by bein' nosy. And then Taka would smile that beautiful smile and laugh that beautiful laugh and they could hug it out and get back to studyin' and maybe hold hands and Jesus this guy was turnin' him into such a dork. Maybe Sakakura had a point.

Suddenly, he couldn't move the weight anymore. He wasn't really paying attention, but when his eyes came back into focus, they were met with quietly furious auburn ones. "Hello, Mr. Oowada."

"AH!" He screamed. Thank god Taka was holding the bar, otherwise it woulda crashed right into his chest. "Taka! When did you—" 

"I just had a _fascinating_ conversation with Ms. Fujisaki," he set the weight down on the rack. "Ms. Kirigiri, is it alright if I cut your workout short? I need to have a _private_ discussion with Mr. Oowada." Oh God, he was _so_ in the fuckin' dog house. 

"Of course, officer, I wouldn't want to interrupt such an important matter." She thought this was funny! The bitch! 

"Thank you," Taka bowed. "Mr. Oowada, if you would please follow me." 

When they got outside the weight room, Mondo tried talking, but was cut off. "You technically didn't do anything to warrant punishment, but I do have to give you a warning and a recommendation to apologize to Mr. Kuwata. I have provided him with the same. I cannot talk about this to any further extent than that while on duty, unless you have any objections or concerns you wish to bring up now."

"I don't…

"Excellent!" So… Mondo's in the clear? "That was my last task before clocking out, hold on a moment please, Mr. Oowada." Taka went over to a screen on the wall, swiped a card, pressed a button, then walked back. He outstretched his hand. "Shall we go, then?" 

"Go… where?" 

"Back to your dorm, of course! You need to shower, silly, you're all sweaty." 

"Oh, well, uh, the locker rooms got showers, 'n they're right over there, so…" 

"Don't be ridiculous, Mondo! I'm not going to berate you in a _public_ _restroom!"_

_Fuck!_

Mondo sighed and took his hand. "Lead the way."

"Starting a fight!"

"I'm sorry." 

"In the middle of the dining hall!"

"I'm sorry…"

"While I was working!"

"I'm sorry!"

"And poor Chihiro was trying to do _homework!"_

"Babe, I said I was _sorry!"_ Mondo slammed the water thingy off and threw on a towel, trudging out of the shower and gettin' water all over the goddamn floor. Taka was sittin' on the toilet (lid down) and lookin' at Mondo with… okay, well he didn't really know what that emotion was. Fear? Frustration? F...sadness? He didn't really like any of those options. "Look, I—" he sighed, waddled over (turned out wet tile was slippery as fuck), and took Taka's head by the chin, lifting it slightly. "I know, I fucked up—"

"You did."

"I did! But, I— it's like— y'know how I get."

"I really don't, Mondo," Taka grabbed his free hand. "You only ever tell me snippets of what it's like, I have to infer the rest." 

"Yeah, okay, alright, guilty as charged. That's parta the problem, I bottle shit up and eventually it explodes out. Like shakin' a soda." 

Taka rubbed his thumb against Mondo's knuckles and leaned into his hand, a way of saying 'continue.'

"I'm worried that if I crack the lid, even a little, it'll all shoot out— 'cause, I mean, like, that's what happens when I get mad, y'know? I get so worked up that I don't even notice the bottle's leakin' 'til it's already stainin' the fuckin' carpet— Christ, this is a shitty metaphor."

"It's fine, if it helps you talk then it's fine." 

"Taka, it's— it's not fine. I'm not fine, and I can't say why, and I dunno why I can't say why." 

"And that's _fine_ — Mondo, I—" He squeezed his hand and pulled him closer. His eyes were welling up. "I'm so very proud of you. Do you know that? For even being able to admit that to me, for being able to stop yourself from acting on a violent impulse, for keeping enough composure to register that Chihiro was interfering— _that is improvement._ And you've _worked so hard_ for it, you've found healthier outlets, you've allowed yourself to be vulnerable, you've fought an uphill battle with schoolwork that once felt impossible to win, _that's hard._ And you continue to try. I see it every day. That makes me very proud." 

"T-Taka I— You—" _He wouldn't say alla that if he knew about the accident._

_Yes he would._

_No he wouldn't, shut the fuck up!_

_But he promised. He promised to hear ya out, didn't he?_

_Yeah, numbnuts, but you ain't exactly holdin' up your end of the deal!_ _You unloaded alla this onto the guy without even askin',_ "Hey, bro, I— y'know, that goes for you, too? Like, I'm prouda ya, and how far ya come, and I want ya to feel like you can open up if, I dunno... maybe... somethin's botherin' you?" 

Taka sighed, resting his head on the bendy bit between Mondo's chest and his abs. "Darn, you noticed…"

"'Course I did…"

"You… you don't have to worry about it. It's silly."

"It isn't 'n I do. It's not healthy for you to be doin' all the heavy liftin', Kiyotaka."

"I don't! You've been so much of a help to me! That's why I…" The tears were cold on his torso. Mondo snaked his arm around Taka's back, patting him gently. He sorta already knew where this was goin', but he'd like to hear it from the man himself. Taka returned the hug. "That's why... I'm scared. I have no frame of reference for how relationships shift over time and, I've made so many friends this semester, I don't want to lose them. I've become so reliant on others, but that doesn't mean they're the same way, or that wanting to be with me isn't merely a result of overexposure; now that they're getting a break, they'll realize I'm annoying."

Shit… this whole Kirigiri thing'd gotten him _bad._ "You ain't annoyin'. I swear on it. I'm gonna miss you so much, every single day I'm home, just like I usually do."

Taka smiled into his belly. "Thank you…"

"And… Taka, I… I'm sorry that I can't always, say shit, right away. It's not 'cause of you, it's… it's like, there's this wall in fronta me. And I wanna tell you shit. One day, I'll tell you everythin'. Promise."

"I… I feel a similar way, a lot of the time. I promise, one day I will, too."

They sat in silence for a moment.

"Mondo, could I ask you for a favor?

"Anythin'."

"Could I… visit your house over the break? And meet Daiya in person?"

Well that's... Not what he was expectin'. "I mean, sure, but, wouldn't you rather do that when it's less of a hike? Don'tcha live, like, three hours from here?" 

"I'm not going home."

_"What?!"_

"My father's working the whole time, I'd be alone regardless. I'd much rather be alone _here,_ where I don't have to pack and pay train fare to do it." 

"But, what about your ma? Don'tcha wanna see her?" 

"Oh, Mondo… She died seven years ago." 

"Oh."

"I'm sorry," they said in unison.

Mondo ran his fingers through Taka's hair. "This turned… _real_ serious." 

"I must admit, I didn't imagine that I'd tell you about any of that whilst sitting on the toilet." 

Mondo let out a snort. "At least _you're_ not basically naked."

Taka laughed. "Yes, that is true!" He stood up, still holding Mondo close as he met him at face level. "Come on, let's get you dressed. Then, maybe we could watch a movie?"

"Tomorrow's finals, shouldn't we be studyin'?"

"That's odd," Taka poked his tummy and examined his face, "you _look_ like Mondo Oowada, but that can't be right—"

"Shut up!" He barked, _definitely not_ blushing super hard. 

Chuckling, Taka kissed him on the cheek. 

Damn it! He _was_ rubbin' off on him!

-◇⬗◆⬖◇-

Standing outside of the Oowada household, Kiyotaka Ishimaru finally felt the nerves set in.

By all accounts, he shouldn't be nervous. He'd talked to Daiya multiple times before, the two had long since exchanged contact information. He seemed like a very nice man. 

...And yet, he found himself apprehensive. 

Closing his eyes, he took a deep breath, stretched his back, then opened them again. He exhaled all the doubt from his system and felt his trusty overconfidence return. He gave three solid knocks.

Daiya Oowada did not look how Kiyotaka had expected.

Not that that was a bad thing! It's just… a bit strange, that Mondo never mentioned, in all this time, that his brother used a wheelchair. That seemed like the sort of thing that would've come up at some point, though now that he thought about it, he wasn't really sure why. Certainly, it was in part due to personal biases; he could admit that. But also because it was so… relevant to the way he navigated the world. He was certain, for example, that Daiya was already aware of Kiyotaka's own disabilities. They were intrinsic to his life and his identity, how could they not've come up? But, everybody thinks about things differently, and the Oowadas definitely lived different lives than he did, he shouldn't be as shocked that it never had relevance to any of their stories. 

Otherwise, Daiya _did_ look like he was related to Mondo; though, he didn't know if he'd say they looked like brothers. They had the same grey-blue eye color and a similar jawline, but Daiya's hair was straight, jet black, and considerably shorter than he could ever imagine Mondo's being (even if it was still considerably longer than Kiyotaka's own hair.) The shapes of his eyes and nose were different, and his skin wasn't as tan. His frame was leaner than his brother's, but he looked like he might be the taller of the two. His arms were covered in scars and tattoos. What would Mondo look like with tattoos? Why didn't Mondo already have tattoos? 

But, how rude! The door had been opened for at least twenty seconds and he still had yet to say, "Good morning, sir! My name is Kiyotaka Ishimaru, I believe in bold simplicity. It is a pleasure to meet you!" 

To be fair to Kiyotaka, Daiya was doing his fair share of gawking, too. His thoughts, as thoughts so often are, were completely unreadable, but his eyes were scrutinous and sharp. Kiyotaka imagined that he probably looked quite a bit different than most of Mondo's friends. 

Especially given that, "You're... in ya school uniform…"

"Of course! I am a student, after all!" 

"Well, yeah, but not, like, right now..."

Kiyotaka scrunched his eyebrows. "Yes, I am? I'm always a student, at least until I graduate."

"He's always a student!" Daiya parroted in disbelief to the sky. Kiyotaka looked up and, as he had anticipated, found nothing there for him to have been talking to. He looked back and Daiya seemed a little unnerved. "Are ya gonna come in, or…" 

"You have not invited me inside."

"What, you a vampire or somethin'?" 

He heavily resisted the urge to sigh dramatically. Vampire, that was one he hadn't been called in awhile. "No, sir, if I were a vampire, I would not be able to go out during the day time," he explained, fighting the urge to laugh. All these years later and it still sounded completely ridiculous. Would it be insensitive to mention that he also couldn't be one because vampires weren't real? Could one religiously believe in the existence of vampires?

Daiya chuckled nervously; oh, good, he was nervous, too! That helped a lot. "Aight, if ya ain't a vampire, then I guess it's cool for you to come in." Hm, a pretty smart caveat if you believed vampires were real! He walked inside.

"Thank you for inviting me into your home, sir!"

"Kid, I told ya, just Daiya's fine."

"Right! Thank you for letting me into your home, Daiya!" The man backed away from him slightly. Oops, he may have said that a bit too loudly!

"Uh, yeah, no problemo, kid," Daiya gave him a thumbs up. So _that's_ where Mondo learned it! "Can I call ya Taka?"

"Certainly! I'd be honored."

"Well, Taka, the big man's still sleepin', he don't usually get up before nine if he can help it—"

"Nine?!" Taka balked. "I've been up since five!" He never realized Mondo's sleep debt situation was so dire! 

"Jesus Christ," Daiya said under his breath. "Uh, yeah. If you want, I could make some coffee. I was about to start makin' breaky, anyway." 

"Oh, I wouldn't want to impose—"

"Dude, what! Seriously, the hell! Ya bein' for fuckin' real right now!? YOU AT THE RIGHT DAMN HOUSE!?" 

Kiyotaka tensed up. "Yes, sir— Daiya. I made sure to double check the address."

"Shit, I—" Palming his face, Daiya sighed. "Sorry, kiddo, I… I didn't mean to snap at ya, I ain't really woken up yet an' all the formalities is makin' me sweat like a whore in church." 

"That's alright, you are forgiven," he smiled. "Mondo isn't a morning person either." 

"Ya got that fuckin' right!" Daiya laughed and slapped him heartily on the back. "Promise I'll be more perky after I got food in my belly 'n caffeine in my blood." He stretched before holding out his hand. "Let's start over, eh?"

"Okay!" Kiyotaka saluted and walked back out the front door. He could hear Daiya chuckle from the other side— good, attempt number two was already going better than the one before!

Three sturdy knocks.

Daiya opened the door with a dramatic flare, gesturing grandly with over-enunciated words. "Why, greetin's! What a handsome young man that has appeared uponst my doorstep, completely unbeknownst to me! My name is Daiya Oowada, 'n I am the duke of this humble maison! Please, allow me to invite ya into our lovely little abode!" His acting could use some work, but Kiyotaka appreciated the effort.

"Good morrow, my fine gentleman! But, Mr. Oowada, sir— Daiya, if I may call you that— you ought to not invite strangers into your house so readily. So, let us no longer be strangers, but instead, friends! My name is Kiyotaka Ishimaru, and I believe in bold simplicity! You may adress me as Taka!"

"Then please, noble Taka, join me inside, so that we mightst share a meal 'n build our camaraderie!"

Kiyotaka walked in and applauded. "Bravo!"

"Thank you, thank you," Daiya gave a bow before clapping. "An' to you as well." 

"Oh, thank you!" Kiyotaka bowed. 

"Aight, c'mon, if breakfast ain't done by the time lil bro wakes up, he's gonna pitch a fit."

"Is there anything I could help with?"

"Yeah, actually, could you get the rice goin'?" 

"On it!" 

They set to work preparing the meal together. Kiyotaka didn't chat as they did so, but maybe he should've. Daiya kept glancing over at him every once in awhile, but must not've been able to find the right small talk to fill the air with. Thankfully, it wasn't _tense_ anymore, only… a bit awkward. Like the rapport they'd built was fragile. He shouldn't be surprised that this happened; Kiyotaka wasn't renowned for his fabulous conversational skills. He was, however, known for his ability to work hard and follow directions, which meant that breakfast was done about ten minutes ahead of schedule (a schedule that he was sure, as somebody who had cooked with the boy before, was designed with Mondo's style of 'assistance' in mind.) 

Daiya wheeled up to the table, placing two coffee mugs in front of them. 

"Need sugar or anythin'?"

"No, thank you." Sugar made coffee taste better, but it also made it stickier. The dilemma of sweet foods.

"Take it black, eh? Suits ya," Daiya said, mixing in creamer.

"Does how one likes their coffee say something about them?"

"Maybe, maybe not. I dunno 'bout that shit; just figured, y'know, bold simplicity 'n alla that."

Kiyotaka smiled, surprised. "Thank you." 

"What for?"

"People don't usually remember." 

He snorted. "I sure hope I'd fuckin' remember, you said it _twice_ not even thirty minutes ago."

"You'd be shocked," he sipped his coffee.

And there Kiyotaka had gone, making Daiya uncomfortable again. They sat in an odd sort of silence for a few more moments. 

"Y'know, Taka," Daiya's tone was serious as he set down the mug, "I should be the one thankin' you. Mondo, he's… he's been havin' kinda a rough go at it, ever since the accident. I mean, we both sorta have, but… it, it hit him pretty hard, brain-wise, 'specially with it comin' right on topa his ma bein' thrown in the slammer again 'n havin' ta take over the Diamonds 'n— look, he just, he ain't been the same. He was such a happy kid, y'know? But, he wasn't nomore— 'n I'm sure Chihiro 'n Kyoko 'n alla them been helpin' too, but— but, when he talks 'bout you, I can see that happy kid again, sometimes, 'n that means a lot. I guess, what I'm sayin' is, I'm sorry for the way I've been all mornin'; I've been stressin' over tryin' to figure out how ta say this to ya, but I can tell now you're the kinda guy who likes it told to ya straight, so. Thanks." 

Uncharacteristically, Kiyotaka was speechless. Well, aside from his automatic, "You're welcome, I forgive you." Manners were all his mind could muster at the moment. There was… so much there, a lot of which he hadn't the _faintest idea about._ What was that about Mondo's mother? About the Diamonds? About an accident? _What was the accident?_ He should start there. Or maybe he shouldn't. Mondo clearly would've mentioned it before if he'd wanted him to know. Actually, why hadn't he? It sounded like a pretty major moment in Mondo's life, given how Daiya was talking about it. Did he get hurt? Were there medical needs that Kiyotaka needed to keep in mind when planning their activities? There. He should start there. With safety, safety was always at the top on the triage. "Are there—"

He was cut off by the sound of a door slamming and loud footsteps rushing towards them. Kiyotaka looked back in time to see a fresh-out-of-bed Mondo before he was hoisted into a near bone-crushing bear hug. 

"TAKA!" He spun him around in circles, ruffling his hair and nuzzling into his trapezius. "Bro, I missed ya so much!" 

Kiyotaka laughed and hugged back as best he could. "I missed you too! But, Mondo," he half teased, "you're late. You should be keeping your sleep schedule the same as it is for school, even during breaks."

Mondo smiled at him, fond but somehow restrained. "I know, I know, I've been tryin'! I keep on sleepin' through my alarm." 

_God, he wanted to kiss him._

Ah. Kiyotaka now understood his restraint. Obviously, that wasn't something they could do in front of Daiya. Subtlety, then. "We'll see if I can remedy that while I'm here," he flirted. 

Mondo blushed. Mission success. "I don't doubt it." 

"Food's gettin' cold, ya sappy sonsabitches," Daiya interrupted.

"Right! I helped Daiya prepare breakfast today!"

"Nice! Maybe it'll actually be edible!"

Daiya snorted from the table, talking through the egg he was shovelling into his mouth. "Fuck off, asshole!"

Kiyotaka smiled at the argument that followed. 

Yes. They might not exactly look like it, but these two were _definitely_ brothers. 

-◇⬗◆⬖◇-

Flopping back down on the bed, Mondo Oowada finally felt his nerves settle down.

Taka didn't ask about the Daiya situation. Daiya hadn't noticed him getting too touchy with Taka. Taka and Daiya got along well. It was fine. He was doin' fine. He 'n Taka were havin' a great time. They were gonna have a great time.

_Get outta your own head, goddamnit!_

"Yes, father, we're being safe. Yes, father, we've been studying too. Yes, father, his older brother is home. Yes, father. Yes, father. Yes. _Father!"_

A hearty chuckle from the other line. 

"That's not funny! No, it isn't… fine, it is, a little bit. Really? Well, he might. I'll ask." Taka looked over at Mondo, covering the phone with his hand. "He would like to speak with you." 

Did he say his nerves were settling down? Well, uh, guess fuckin' not. "Kay..." Mondo gulped as he took the phone. "Hello?" 

"Is this Mondo Oowada?" A tired, grim voice asked.

"The one and only." 

"My name is Takaaki Ishimaru. I'm Kiyotaka's father. Nice to meet you."

"Likewise." God, this was makin' him sweat like a whore in church. Mondo hated talkin' to _cops_ as is, let alone when they were ~~his boy~~ his _bro's_ dad. He was just prayin' he didn't know 'bout the—

"So, how's your band of hooligans doing?" 

—gang. _Damnit!_ "They're doin' fine…" 

"Kiyotaka will not be joining them."

His throat went dry. "'Course not."

"Good! I'm glad we're on the same page, Mr. Oowada."

"It's Mon—"

"As you know, my Kiyotaka, he's a very sweet boy."

"He is..."

"So we can agree that if he got hurt, it'd be very upsetting."

"Yeah…"

"Physically _or_ emotionally, I mean."

"Yeah…" 

"But, we don't have to worry about that, do we?" Mondo didn't get intimidated often, but man... Taka's dad's voice could get _scary._

"N-no, sir..." 

"Good lad. Listen, son. I'm not... _thrilled_ about you, but… you _do_ make him happy. If you keep doing that, we shouldn't have problems. Put Kiyo back on the phone."

"Taka," Mondo said, handin' the phone over. He's not sure if he said it to get his attention or to assert nickname dominance (he's petty. Sue 'im.) 

"Thank you, bro!" Taka leaned in, sneaking a kiss on Mondo's cheek before takin' it 'n truckin' on through with his and his old man's convo, like nothin' happened. Alla Mondo's nerves melted away. _That crafty bastard._ He laid back down. Watchin' Taka pace around, he let his mind wander.

Mondo really was _nothin'_ like him and Kiri. Every time he thought about 'the autism question,' that's what he came back to. Taka 'n Kyoko noticed _every damn detail_ of _every damn thing,_ meanwhile Mondo couldn't even _read_ properly half the goddamn time. Like, how many times had he'd stared at Taka's face, 'n never noticed that faint scar goin' from the bridge of his nose to just about his eyebrow, or the one that peaked out on his upper lip, or the little one right there on his jaw, or that one dancing across his knuckles and hey, now that he thought about it, Taka had some pretty gnarly scars on his back and his stomach— Jesus, this guy had a lot of scars, actually. Mondo's stomach lurched. Why'd he have so many scars? And the types of scars he had— they were the kind that were dime a dozen on Diamonds. The kinda scars somebody _gave_ ya, not the kinda scars that you just _got._

_Bzzt Bzzt._

He put his slowly simmering rage on the back burner to look at the text.

 _Sweetie💕:_ Here! :-)

—Wait, shit, that's the one from this morning. 

_Bchtoiby💩:_ D00000D

 _Bcithboy💩:_ IIST TRU??

 _Bitchboy💩:_ TSKA VORE?????

 _Mon🐶:_ fuck off leon

 _Bitchboy💩:_ NO ON IM BIGN 4RAEL MAN

 _Bitchboy💩_ : LSTIN i git hte stihc own don wrry

 _Bitchboy💩:_ d00d imonga wnimgan 4 u os hrad d00d!!!!!!!!

 _Bitchboy💩:_ best wngamn u eva SENE

 _Mon🐶:_ litrraly wht pn the fuck r u talkin bout

 _Mon🐶:_ *in

 _Bitchboy💩:_ cih chi tdl me wzuap

 _Bitchboy💩:_ well oik no she dintd not rlly bt i fugrid it ou t

 _Bitchboy💩:_ loko ik u psorb dnt spesu rsut me rn BT im ghonaelnp u out weesrsais 

_Bitchboy💩:_ u suhodla jus sed stmgn in th 1st palce tho d00d 4rale i cadu ben helpin u 4 lyk. sooo lnog

 _Bitchboy💩:_ wehtvs tho 

_Bitchboy💩:_ wthr u 2 doin rn

 _Mon🐶:_ nunya

 _Bitchboy💩:_ boo

 _Bitchboy💩:_ laem

 _Bitchboy💩:_ im cliln n bukap

 _Mon🐶:_ dude is ur key baord like broke or smthn 

_Bitchboy💩:_ 🙄

_Cih🐛 has been added to the conevratsion. Say hi!_

_Chi🐛:_ OwO wtahs tish? 

_Chi🐛:_ oh.

 _Chi🐛:_ loen i tldo u to laeev him anole. 

_Bitchboy💩:_ NNOTOIS LKUE

 _Bitchboy💩:_ IMPARTNOT 

_Mon🐶:_ srsly man r u drunk

 _Bitchboy💩:_ chi wr goat git ths man a WIGMNANS TAT

 _Chi🐛:_ 😥sorry i ralely don't know what ur sainyg…..

 _Chi🐛:_ oh wiat i tinhk i got it!

 _Chi🐛:_ odygohm yes!!!!!

 _Chi🐛:_ i've bene tgyrin but they won't let me :c

 _Chi🐛:_ well, mon won't.

 _Chi🐛:_ taak didn't raelly seem to care but then aiagn i can nvree tell what he's thgnkiin 🤔

 _Mon🐶:_ m eoght here u kno

 _Mon🐶:_ *igrht

 _Mon🐶:_ *rukht

 _Mon🐶:_ fuck it

 _Chi🐛:_ well, wtra'he u adn taka doing now?

 _Mon🐶:_ nunya

 _Chi🐛:_ ...waht's….. nunya…….

 _Mon🐶:_ NUNYA DANM BUISINESS!!!!!

 _Bitchboy💩:_ nice

 _Mon🐶:_ gottem 

_Chi🐛:_ T-T 

He felt arms slink over his sides and breath against the back of his neck. A warm hand crept under his shirt and onto his chest, gently pushing him backwards into Taka's hug. Mondo put his phone down when he heard him sigh.

"What's up, babe?" 

Taka rested his head on his back, chuckling slightly. "It's nothing, it can just be a little tiring talking to him sometimes. I love my father, and he loves me, but we do _not_ understand each other."

Mondo snorted. "Yeah, I get that." 

"Who were you talking to?"

He groaned, "Leon 'n Chi were buggin' me." 

He could feel Taka smile. "You and Leon made up?"

"Sorta. I guess. Yeah." 

"That's fantastic!" 

"I wouldn't go _that_ far."

Taka hummed. "I would. Hey, bro, what's this?" 

Mondo turned around to look at what he was talking about (somewhat unwillingly; he'd never admit it, but he really liked bein' the little spoon.) "It's a dog." 

"Clearly," Taka laughed. "But, what is it doing there?"

"Sometimes when I'm bored or upset, I'll dig my fingernails into the bedframe. Started makin' actual shapes 'n shit 'cause Daiya said it'd look nicer than a buncha slashes." 

Taka traced the dog carving on the headboard with his fingertips. "You made a drawing this detailed with your nails? That's so impressive! It looks really good, bro!"

"Shaddup, no it don't," Mondo blushed. _It's ugly,_ Dad would always tell him, _ya ruinin' the goddamn furniture ya dumbass sonuvabitch._

"Have you tried making a carving with tools?" 

"Yeah, few times. I'd do it more, but Daiya's had the workbench out in the garage booked solid since— since—" shit! There he went, talkin' faster than his brain could go, "—since he, uh, started moddin' out his bike." 

"What about the art room at school? You could try working there."

He scoffed. "And risk havin' to hang with _Yamada?_ Fat chance. 'Sides, I ain't a goddamn artist." 

"You shouldn't speak so poorly of our classmates, and yes you are. If one makes art, they're an artist; this is art, that you made— therefore, _you_ are an artist." 

"No way, man! Ain't artists s'posed to be sensitive 'n shit? Do I look sensitive to you?" 

"Yes, but that's besides the point as I don't believe that's absolutely necessary to the craft."

"Yes?!? Whaddya mean _yes?!?"_ Mondo scrunched his eyebrows, miffed but not mad. More curious than anything.

Taka laughed. "Being sensitive isn't a bad thing. Mondo, I like that you're sensitive. I like you."

"That's it," Mondo sat up. "Somebody needs to knock you down a peg. You're too damn nice to me!" He lunged onto him and started tickling his sides.

"Hahaha! I refuse to yield," Taka squirmed, managing to break free and flip them around, tickling Mondo's sides instead.

"SHIT! FUCK! AH!" He wheezed. He tried fighting back, but Taka caught his arms by the wrists and pinned them down, forcing a stalemate. He had too much leverage on him. "Alright! _Fine!_ Uncle! Uncle! You _win!"_ Mondo chuckled out.

He let go of his wrists and stared down at him, in the way that Taka always stares at people when he's thinkin' 'bout them. 

Here's to hopin' it's somethin' good.

Mondo reached up and cupped his face, lightly brushing over the scar on his lip. It was enough to snap him outta his blank staring and get him to actually _look_ at him. 

Mondo's mouth sped past his brain. Alright, so maybe speedin' _was_ a bad thing.

"Why didn't ya go home?"

Taka sighed, smilin' sadly as he met the hand on his face. "You're so smart."

"I really ain't."

"Don't say that, you are. Truthfully, it's… my father, he doesn't want me returning to that house. Not anymore than I absolutely have to."

"You mean… but I thought… you and your old man seem like you care about each other a lot, how could he just... kick you out like that?"

Taka's eyes grew wide. "Heavens, no! No, that's not what happened at all! It's… that house, it isn't safe for me for a lot of reasons. It's not really safe for him, either, but he can't afford to move. A lot of bad memories live there, some more actively dangerous than others."

"Bad memories?"

He paused. Prolly scriptin'. "My grandfather… could be a very cruel man sometimes…" Taka choked out, "and that's not even mentioning what the neighbors would do to us," Mondo latched onto him before the tears could make it outta his eyes.

"That's fucked. Sweetheart, that's so fucked," he whispered into his ear as he rubbed his back. 

"I know, it is," he sobbed, "But... I loved my grandfather, I cared about my neighbors. I can't bring myself to hate them; I mean, from their perspectives, I deserved it—"

"No you did fuckin' not!"

"I—I know that!"

"Repeat after me: _I did not fuckin' deserve that."_

"I didn't deserve that."

"I did not fuckin' deserve that!"

"I did not deserve that!"

"I did not _fuckin'—"_

"Mondo, I'm not saying the f-word."

They laughed briefly before going silent for a few minutes. He gently brushed his fingers through his hair.

Finally, Taka broke the silence. "...Being reminded of what they did to me, I can't… Last summer was the first time I'd been back there in three years, and it— it went so poorly that— it basically confirmed to my father that it wasn't the best place for me to be anymore. But leaving him alone like this…"

"Hey," Mondo removed one of his arms from the hug in order to hold Taka's hand, "safety's the most important thing, ain't it? That goes for you as much as anyone. Whether it's your brain or your body. It might not be easy, but… if it keeps ya safe, then…" God, he was horrible at this. 

Taka squeezed his hand. "You're right. You're so smart. Thank you."

Mondo squeezed back. "Anytime. I seriously, seriously mean it. Anytime ya need to talk, need anythin' at all, I'm here for you. Any. Time."

"Mondo… I… You know I feel the same about you, right? You can talk about anything. _Anything."_

_He says that now, but he wouldn't if he knew._

_He'd hate you._

_He's never going to talk to you again._

_He won't want you anymore._

_He'll want to leave._

_He should leave._

_He's lying._

_His eyes are so damn big._

"I…" 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello again hello again! I hope you all enjoyed this one! Sorry for the angsty cliffhanger haha😅 also i hope you don't mind the like. Weird texting section it's intentionally obtrusive and hard to understand bc i wanted it to be like you were reading it from Mondo's perspective, but i can't tell if i pulled it off asdgjljddfgj. until this point all the chapters have been prewritten, but I hit a bit of a slow streak on the next one. Everything's all planned out though and I think I'm pushing through it, so hopefully I'll be able to keep my weekly update schedule! There's only a couple chapters left, its very exciting but also a little nerve-wracking! Anywho! Thank you for reading this chapter (and listening to me ramble) and THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU to the people who've left comments! I know I sound like a broken record but it really means so much to me that people take the time out of their day to write such lovely messages. Have a marvelously magnificent day and I hope to see you again soon!


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